DARPA releases alien pathogen in Michoacán

Funny story written by Dracula

Saturday, 16 February 2019

image for DARPA releases alien pathogen in Michoacán
Alien prion's from a world millions of light years away

DARPA the Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency, an agency of the United States Department of Defense, responsible for the development of emerging technologies for use by the military, has created an amazing AI that can create alien microbes that live on other worlds.

The AI uses a NVIDIA-designed generative adversarial network, where different algorithms compete against each other to improve the quality of crafted alien microbes using a large catalog of alien worlds that have been observed by the Hubble telescope.

The AI uses, artificial neural networks, to assemble various gravities, various light sources, various air pressures, and different types of chemistry to replicate Hubble's habitable worlds in algorithmic form. Using the laws of physics, the AI creates an alien DNA pattern which is then assembled on a biological printer.

The result was an incurable alien prion, a sort of non-living organisim sometimes referred to as CWD, which turns animals into zombies.

It was injected into mice to study the effects, and after noticing that it was active, the military then decided to release the alien prion in Michoacán, Mexico, to study the tissue of zombies that get infected as the prion spreads through the population. Mexico was an excellent natural setting that allowed the alien prion to demonstrate its evolutionary abilities to adapt to the earth environment.

The alien prion caused reclusive Mexican specimens to stumble around, drool and get aggressive toward each other. It's being called a "zombie condition" because once infected, the Mexican specimens are known to lose weight and become listless, among other strange behaviors. It's been said that it's impossible for anyone to tell when a specimen has CWD. The neurological condition affects any type of living organism.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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