Written by Jaggedone

Monday, 9 April 2018

image for 5 star cheese served in noble UK restaurant was 'mouldy!'
No "Mouldy old Dough" here! Just "Mouldy old Supermarket Cheese" for £13,00 Quid!!

Eating out in the UK can be damn expensive thanks to the hype around Masterchef & Co, but eating mouldy cheese in a noble restaurant and, paying £13 quid for the pleasure, wasn't funny for punters in Bristol, UK!

In addition, to add insult to injury, the cheese was purchased from a supermarket for the 'ripe' old price of £1,15!

Believing they were devouring a gorgeous French cheese, hand-made with love and care, and ripened for at least 10 years, the punters flipped over the bottom of the cheese, and low and behold, the chef preparing the hors d'oeuvres, forgot to remove the supermarket label!!

Jaggedone, after hearing of this disgraceful rip-off, sent his top CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) food critic and reporter, who entered via a blocked with fat drainpipe, but enjoyed every second, Reginald Camilla-Bollocks, down to the restaurant to find out what all the stink was about, and it did, stink! Here are his findings after scampering into the cheese cooler:

"JO, I can certainly confirm that the cheeses in this gaff stink, are mouldy, and have labels wrapped around them from every UK supermarket plus those German cheap-skates beginning with A und L?"

"JO, I overheard two waiters laughing their butts off as they served the cheap, mouldy cheese to their very posh customers because the boss had promised them a 'chunk' of a bonus from the profit made by ripping them off!"

Luckily, the scam was exposed, star CIA food critic, Reginald Camilla-Bollocks, returned safely to HQ, and reported his findings to superstar flasher, of all things dastardly, Jaggedone!

Now JO has been invited to appear on Masterchef UK to take the place of one of those toffee-nosed food critics who have egos as fat as their expanding bellies, and have nothing better to do than wine and dine at the finest UK restaurants for fuck all, and get paid for the pleasure, BURP!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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