Joey's Urban launches Nuu Muu Muu staff uniforms

Funny story written by dave.holland@joeys.ca

Thursday, 4 August 2016

image for Joey's Urban launches Nuu Muu Muu staff uniforms
Hippy Happy Days at Joey's Urban

Joey's Urban is pleased to announce the launch of new staff uniforms on August 1 2016, which will allow employees the ability to express their sense of freedom.

The new staff uniforms (shown here) meet the functional needs of Joey's workforce…sort of…and reflect the kind of free-thinking that has made Joey's a leader in the fast casual restaurant industry.

Keanu Kamehameha, advisor to Joey's Urban Restaurants led the uniform steering committee and says the change highlights the "personality" of Joey's outstanding staff and not their personal "highlights".

"It's clear that some chains believe skin is in," says Mr. Kamehameha, "However, there is something to be said about leaving a little (or a lot) to the imagination. Joey's Urban saw a need to change the way employees feel at work and it started with the way they dressed. Muumuu's allow our employees to show their true colours - from the neck up."

Several Canadian restaurant chains have been publicly criticized for their sexually exploitive uniform policies lately and Joey's is often confused with them, says Andy Taylor, President of Joey's Only Franchising Ltd.

Our research shows that customers enjoy themselves more when they have a colourful server - and there's nothing more colourful than a server in a Halston or Christian Dior Muumuu flowing out of the kitchen carrying two plates of Canada's best Fish Tacos.

"We can't understand how the Muumuu, a once-celebrated clothing item, has been reduced to a swimsuit cover-up," said Vice President of Operations, Todd Perkins. "Or even worse, something that's only worn when couch surfing. That's a job for a Snuggie.

"Muumuu uniforms will let all of our staff tap into their inner Elizabeth Taylor," added Perkins. "They will walk through the dining room practically floating as their Muumuu billows behind. "If this new approach works out as expected, male staff will sport the same fashionable designs afforded to females. We're all for gender equality."

Joey's is asking for your help. Please go to the following link https://www.facebook.com/joeysurban/app/303561899745219/ and vote for your favourite uniform option.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more