Written by Backandtotheleft

Thursday, 11 January 2018

Conservative MP, Tobias Strom, today blasted the use of food banks up and down the country. Talking to forty other like minded cock ends he said:

There is a growing epidemic in this country and I'm not talking about poor people!

This got the expected laugh from the gathered soulless deaddites who hoped support for Tobias and his dark masters would sheppard them into a new golden age.

People have begun using something called a food bank. A dirty use of a beautiful word. A bank should only contain money not food!

A cheer went up from his assembled cultists.

The very notion that it can be used for anything but storing accumulated wealth is sickening. Sickening!

A fly flew out of his mouth and away into the air.

The worst thing! The worst thing!

Angry spittle flew out of his mouth as his hate and bile threatened to consume him.

They give it away...for free! Free! No profit! No money! No investments! No shareholders! Just free food to starving people. Feeding these poverty stricken...things so that they can breed and multiply like a virus is beyond my comprehension. Does it not make you sick?

The crowd cheered once again and we had to agree. Yes it did make us feel rather fucking sick.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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