Reformed sex addict Tiger Woods takes to the golf course again today in the Augusta Masters Tournament. It has been a restrained and - some might say overly conservative - Tiger who has appeared in the media so far. His mood seems sombre and tinged with apprehension.
Which should come as no surprise.
The Augusta pranksters have been working their wicked brand of twisted magic again.
We can reveal that when Tiger went to play a practice round he hit the green, only to find a turned down double bed placed strategically over the cup. Tiger laughed this incident off, but was stuck for words when he went to use the bathroom and was confronted by a naked blonde girl sucking a popsicle. Tiger yelped at this one and ran away with the pranksters laughter ringing in his ears.
Later, as Tiger was lining up a practice putt, every female in the crowd accompanying him, right on cue, started to roll their eyes and lick their lips lasciviously. Tiger didn't appear to take this too well, judging by the way his hands were shaking.
Then there was the running gag, whereby every female Tiger encountered over the weekend introduced herself as 'Ivana Phuque' - as in the Swedish speed skater of theSpoof.com fame.
To his credit, Tiger took it all in good spirits - even when wife Elin put on a Paris Hilton mask - but whether he can still hold it together when scoring a hole in one remains to be seen.
More as we get it.
