NEW YORK CITY – The NBA season will finally be starting after a 4-month hiatus, that’s 2 years and 4 months in dog years.
The Utah Jazz are scheduled to kick off the season against the New Orleans Pelicans.
Utah coach Quin Snyder told Sports Bet Gazette that his team is ready to play.
He stated that the Jazz will be wearing a specially-designed type of mask that completely covers the entire face, and has enough oxygen to last for 72 hours.
Coach Snyder noted that the players have all signed agreement sheets promising not to engage in any fights, heated discussions, or high, mid, and low-fiving.
Utah forward, Bojan Bogdanovich, who wears #44, reportedly is prone to bouts of uncontrollable sneezing.
He has promised that, if he feels a sneezing frenzy coming on, he will immediately call a time out, leave the court, and go outside to the parking lot.
New Orleans Pelicans point guard, Lonzo Ball, has stated that his arrogantly pompous father, LeVar Ball, will be prohibited from entering the arena and making a complete ass of himself.
The league has said that they will no longer allow players sitting on the bench to eat buffalo wings, hot dogs, or tamales.