Harry Maguire In 'Hit And Run' Incident

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 30 September 2019

image for Harry Maguire In 'Hit And Run' Incident
Maguire hoofs the ball forward from defence (reconstruction)

Harry Maguire, the Manchester United and England central defender who crashed into Old Trafford after an £80million summer transfer from Leicester City, has been involved in a 'hit and run' incident.

Maguire, 26, was playing in his usual centre-half role against Arsenal last night, when a misplaced through-ball from the Gunners' captain, Granit Xhaka, came to Maguire near the edge of his own 18-yard box.

He took stock, nudged the ball forward about 10 yards, and, when Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang moved in to challenge Maguire, the United man booted the ball forward with all his might, and began to chase after it, as fast as his legs would carry him.

This move was known at Hull City, as a 'hit and run'.

The ball was headed clear by the Arsenal defence, and Maguire had to turn and jog back to his central defensive position, rather the worse for wear.

United boss, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, who is Norwegian, said after the game:

"It's one he's been practising on the training pitch. Who knows? One day it might come off - hopefully, before I get the sack."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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