Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 16 April 2019

image for Nobody Can Quite Believe Tiger Woods Has Won The Augusta Masters!
Still on a cloud

It was the stuff of fairytales, for sure, as Tiger Woods came back from years in the golfing wilderness after crippling back injuries, to beat all the odds that were stacked against him, and come out on top in the 2019 US Masters at Augusta on Sunday.

And people still can't quite believe it.

The great man, himself, said:

"It really was unexpected. I still can't quite believe it!"

Then, having composed himself, he said:

"I feel like I'm still up on a cloud! Amazing!"

Others felt the same. President Trump tweeted:

"Great, great man! Huge, very big, unbelief on my part!"

Golfing rivals were no different. Phil Miracleson said:

It's a miracle! Absolutely astonishing and unbelievable!"

Woods disbelieving caddie, Eric Doubt, said:

"It hasn't quite sunk in yet."

NBC golfing correspondent, Chuck Bunker, was incredulous:

"It's hard to accept that he's come back and won again after fully eleven years - the level of incredulity is unbelievable!"

And a spectator who followed Tiger around for each of his four rounds, Barry Wilson, said:

"If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it!"

His friend, Thomas Concrete, said rather sternly:

"It is absolutely unbelievable, and, therefore, I refuse to believe it."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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