Blatter For West Ham

Written by j.w.

Friday, 29 May 2015

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Two new signings headed for West Ham

Troubled Fifa President, Sepp Blatter, is to become West Ham's new manager next season, replacing Sam Allardyce.

This astonishing news has rocked the West Ham faithful who fear the inspiration of Allardyce's 0-0 draws and losing in the last minute will be lost forever.

However Karen Brady, West Ham's Vice president was quick to welcome Sepp to the Boleyn Ground. The former Fifa President announced that he was pleased to join the club that had sent England to World Cup victory in 1966.

'I aim to bring those glory days back to the Irons. As we move to the Olympic stadium we will bring the talents of the world to our club'.

Spoof's football guru James Whittingdale had a quick word with Sepp as he was greeted by West Ham mascot Russell Brand. 'I am joining Russell in a revolution' he announced 'a revolution that will bring the best football talents in the world to East London! Gone are the days of corruption in world football.'

Editor's note: We wish James Whittingdale all the best with his new appointment as Director General of the BBC.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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