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Funny satire stories about West Ham United

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Saudi Cash Injection

According to a think tank of "investment consultants" (read: probable wankers) a large group of Saudi Arabian investors are looking to invest in a number of "top London" football clubs. A statement which immediately ruled Tottenham Hotspur out of the...

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Duchess of Knightsbridge: "I shall pay the £millions needed, for the whole London Stadium rebuild, out of my purse!"

Funny story: Duchess of Knightsbridge: "I shall pay the £millions needed, for the whole London Stadium rebuild, out of my purse!"

Troubled London Stadium, Stratford, LONDON: With an expert in Stadium building announcing that the athletics stadium should be demolished and rebuilt properly as a football stadium, the Duchess of Knightsbridge has made an enormous gesture. "Let...

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"Stratfords' Olympic Athletics Stadium to be rebranded as THE ANTS NEST!" states the Duchess of Knightsbridge.

Funny story: "Stratfords' Olympic Athletics Stadium to be rebranded as THE ANTS NEST!" states the Duchess of Knightsbridge.

THE ANTS NEST, Stratford, LONDON: In developments that have even taken the footballing world by surprise, Ms Karen Brady, known by her world wide name as the Duchess of Knightsbridge, has revealed a new rebranding development! "Stratfords' Olympi...

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"Why were 300 Upton Park stewards sacked?" shrieks the Duchess of Knightsbridge.

Funny story: "Why were 300 Upton Park stewards sacked?" shrieks the Duchess of Knightsbridge.

THE Athletics Stadium, Stratford, LONDON: Following the manhandling ejection of the Duchess of Knightsbridge from the London Stadium, whilst the 'Duchess' was standing up singing the West Ham National anthem and being labelled a 'trouble-maker', ser...

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Big Sam's Sacrifice

Funny story: Big Sam's Sacrifice

Big Sam Allardyce has made a glorious gesture and decided that West Ham need him more than England. Th Hammers, now in the relegation zone of the Premier league have been named Harry Gold's Pieces of Eight due to the number of players West Ham se...

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West Ham in Europe Sensation Predicted

Funny story: West Ham in Europe Sensation Predicted

The final matches of the season for the Premier League this weekend have been seen by several mystics and they have been contacting Spoof Football reporter John Westam. They forsee an astonishing end to the season with West Ham ending the season i...

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Ghost of Big Sam Haunts West Ham

Funny story: Ghost of Big Sam Haunts West Ham

A desperate Slaven Bilic, West Ham's brilliant Manager who has placed the Hammers near the top of the Premier League, has recently found the ghost of Big Sam Allardyce haunting his team. Bilic is certain that Sam, now ploughing hard at his new clu...

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Blatter For West Ham

Funny story: Blatter For West Ham

Troubled Fifa President, Sepp Blatter, is to become West Ham's new manager next season, replacing Sam Allardyce. This astonishing news has rocked the West Ham faithful who fear the inspiration of Allardyce's 0-0 draws and losing in the last minut...

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Hammers Fan Off the Danger List

Funny story: Hammers Fan Off the Danger List

West Ham's greatest fan Johnnie Wubble is officially off the danger list. He was in hospital with a chronic heart attack after the Hammers beat Manchester City earlier in the season and were fourth in the Premier League for thirty minutes. A ho...

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West Ham Too Much For My Dodgy Heart

Funny story: West Ham Too Much For My Dodgy Heart

Allardyce has been warned before - the displays recently of the Irons have been endangering the health of the team's fan base. Proof of this was when I was rushed to Hospital minutes before the game against Manchester City. It was not until I had...

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What's Up With West Ham?

Funny story: What's Up With West Ham?

As a Hammers fan of many years - back to the greats of Booby Moore, Trevor Brooking among many others I am indeed shocked by the display against Liverpool on Saturday. Where was the boredom? I felt lost without it, like taking my clothes away. Are...

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Football Returning Just In Time

Funny story: Football Returning Just In Time

Football pundits are sharpening their pens ready for a take over from the Disasters that have been getting us down over the past month or so. Joe Weed, out Football mad reporter can't wait. He's been digging around transfer stories all summer and...

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Moyes for West Ham in Amazing Swap

Funny story: Moyes for West Ham in Amazing Swap

An amazing last minute deal has been fixed between Manchester United's owners and West Ham. In the deal Sam Allardyce will take over as Manager of the Manchester club and David Moyes will manage West Ham. A joint announcement from the two Premier...

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Football fans responsible for dirty dishes

Funny story: Football fans responsible for dirty dishes

Bad news if you do not have a dishwasher and like eating your food using clean cutlery and sparkling plates. West Ham fans, including Ray Winstone, Danny Dyer and some movie person who once saw them on the TV have exhausted the UK's supply of fairy l...

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No Carols for Sam

Funny story: No Carols for Sam

Sam Allardice has had his last throw and a Carol free Christmas is on the cards for him as struggling West Ham sink into relegation trouble. The manager is going to get the boot if he doesn't get things sorted by Christmas. The famous Spoof Foo...

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Russell Brand reveals past as West Ham football fanzine editor

Funny story: Russell Brand reveals past as West Ham football fanzine editor

Film star, comedian and former 'shagger of the year' Russell Brand has revealed he used to write, print and sell his own West Ham fanzine in the 1990s. In an interview to plug his 'Messiah Complex' tour, the question of his love of the Hammers was...

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West Ham Reveal Ravel Revelationn

Funny story: West Ham Reveal Ravel Revelationn

West Ham supporters have been searching the works of the composer Ravel, following the dramatic development of their goal scoring genius Ravel Morrison. Tipped to replace the Bubbles song and the Christmas Carol, 'Where Are You, Father Christmas?'...

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West Ham to Sue Government

West Ham may be goal shy away from home but they are fighting a real fight over their image with the Government. 'As the Government is blowing so many bubbles' complained Big Sam Allardyce, West Ham Manager 'we have been forced to take legal actio...

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Breaking news…

Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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