Premier League to investigate Man United's 14-0 win at Sunderland

Written by radiogagger

Friday, 11 May 2012

image for Premier League to investigate Man United's 14-0 win at Sunderland
Business News: The Glazers have recently reduced their debts after 'good trading results'

The Premier League have promised a swift and concise investigation into Man United's record breaking win at Sunderland on Sunday which secured them the Premier Ship title on goal difference.

The investigation was welcomed by Betfarce and other online betting companies, who all reported significant amounts placed on the exact score - the highest ever in Premiershite history.

The shock result gave Man United the title on goal difference over City of Manchester rivals Manchester City who could only manage to beat QPR 3-0.

Scorers on the day were Paul Scholes (3), Wayne Rooney (3), Ryan Giggs, Dimitar Berbatov, Rio Ferdinand, Danny Wellbeck (3), Michael Carrick and Nani. Thirteen of the fourteen goals came in stoppage time added on by neutral referee Howard 'MU' Webb.

There were no unusual incidents or delays during the 90 minutes of normal time. Webb blew the final whistle at 5.05pm, a full 17 minutes after Man City's game finished.

A City official told 606 "We began to smell a rat when we saw Berbatovs name on the scoresheet".

Wayne Rooney's father Mr Rooney Snr, who was viewing new houses with estate agents in Alderley Edge when we called him, commented "I just had a hunch that United might go goal crazy. Well even if they (the Premier League) do decide the score was fixed - I've already collected my winnings. And melted young Wazzas medal down and sold it on ebay - you have to be quick to make a buck these days".

The Premier League Investigation Unit of Bruce Grobbelaar, Lou Macari and John Fashanua will meet to make a decision in the next 48 hours.

In unrelated news, Martin O'Neill has announced he will be leaving Sunderland with immediate effect to become assistant manager at Old Trafford, with the guarantee of the top job when Sir Alex steps down in ten years time just after his 80th birthday.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more