Wall St numerologists discover new 700 billion digit prime number

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 29 September 2008

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Calculating the number of city fatcat cocaine snorts was the easy part

Off-the-Wall-Street, NYC - (Go-Figure! Mess): City digit crunchers have discovered the world's biggest ever prime number after adding up the square roots of every known Wall Street balance sheet scam and multiplying it by the total of Manhattan ATM cash withdrawals during periods of unfettered Colombian cocaine abundance between 9/11 and the Lehman Brothers' crash of September 2008.

And the figure they have come up with is exactly the same as the bottom line of Hank Paulson's current Wall Street bail-out plan.

The 700 billion digit discovery has been hailed as crucial because it can only be divided by itself or one, making it the vital building block for ever dafter ways of encrypting the overwhelming question in global capital markets:

WTF did all the money go, apart from up the nostrils of City fatcat bonus bastards with their cocaine-ravenous snouts in the corporate greed troughs?

The winning Wall Street numerologists are in line for a whacking great big Nobel Piss Prize handout of around $2 million.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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