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Funny satire stories about Mathematics

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Funny story: Abacus still works after 66 years in loft

Abacus still works after 66 years in loft

When Cambridge astrophysicist Dr Aaron Phelps recently sorted out his loft he was thrilled to discover the abacus his parents gave him on his first birthday, back in 1953. "I had no idea it was up there," Dr Phelps told us. "I thought it had been...

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Funny story: Teacher Embarrassed By Algebra Question

Teacher Embarrassed By Algebra Question

A teacher at a school in Bangkok was left red-faced on Friday after a student asked him a question about algebra that he could not answer. Moys Kenwood, 49, was teaching a Science lesson, during the course of which, the name 'Albert Einstein' came...

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Funny story: Diane Abbott To Host TV's 'Countdown'

Diane Abbott To Host TV's 'Countdown'

Diane Abbott, the popular Labour MP, and all-round entertainer, is to be the new host of teatime TV gameshow, 'Countdown', it has been revealed. 'Countdown' is a British game show broadcast on Channel 4, involving word and number puzzles. It was p...

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Funny story: 2019 - The First Time For 100 Years That The Four Digits Have Added Up To 12

2019 - The First Time For 100 Years That The Four Digits Have Added Up To 12

The new year of 2019 is almost upon us, and a group of mathematics boffins are celebrating that it is the first time for a century that the individual digits of the year have added up to 12! This year - 2018 - the four digits added up to 11, and t...

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Funny story: Man Wakes Up To Find That He Can Recite Pi To A Million Places

Man Wakes Up To Find That He Can Recite Pi To A Million Places

There was a surprise in store for a man in Battambang on Sunday morning, when, woken suddenly from his slumbers by a carhorn outside his window, he started to recite the mathematical constant, Pi. Moys Kenwood, 55, was a reasonable Math student at...

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Funny story: Calculator Stopped Working At Critical Time

Calculator Stopped Working At Critical Time

A calculator which was being used to 'tot up' a list of figures, stopped working at a critical point yesterday, just as the person using it was about to press the '=' sign. Moys Kenwood, 54, received the 'electronic calculating apparatus' as a Chr...

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Funny story: Trump Will Sign Executive Order Removing Math and Science Classes From Schools

Trump Will Sign Executive Order Removing Math and Science Classes From Schools

Mar-A-Lago, FL Trump gave a speech on the golf course today and talked about how he will help safeguard the "future of America." Trump said, "I am tired of the United States coming in #39 and worse in the Global Scholastic Scores. And it's because...

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Funny story: New Study Determines Teenagers Are Not Getting Enough Sleep In Math Class

New Study Determines Teenagers Are Not Getting Enough Sleep In Math Class

A new research study published by the University of Eastleigh proved that teenagers aren't getting enough sleep in their math classes. Dr. Berns, the leading researcher on the project, explained: "Many teenagers struggle from a lack of sleep. Aft...

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Funny story: Math Teacher Unaware that Puns Aren't Cool Anymore

Math Teacher Unaware that Puns Aren't Cool Anymore

Michael Langley, a math teacher at Harrisburg High School, was reportedly unaware that puns aren't cool anymore. Chris Jarvis, a 11th grade student who has been in Langley's class for three straight years, remarks: "Mr. Langley keeps repeating th...

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Funny story: Trump Vows To Ban Arabic Numerals In Case They Have ISIS Sleeper Cell Ties

Trump Vows To Ban Arabic Numerals In Case They Have ISIS Sleeper Cell Ties

In anther appeal to anti-Islamic sentiment republican presidential nominee Donald Trump has stated that he intends to rid the country of Arabic numerals for security reasons. During one of his narcissistic tirades in the middle of a campaign spee...

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Funny story: We want our Super Bowl "L": Roman numeral fans demand

We want our Super Bowl "L": Roman numeral fans demand

New York - After 49 years of identifying its Super Bowl events with Roman numerals, the NFL has switched to modern numbering for Super Bowl 50. But the antique counting system is not going down without a fight. A group of accountants and a qu...

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Funny story: Math Whiz Nash Should Have Known The End Was Near

Math Whiz Nash Should Have Known The End Was Near

Boston, MA - Rhode Scholars and fellow mathematician dorks around the globe, all agree that Professor John Nash, the Nobel Prize winning math genius, and subject of the Oscar winning film, 'A Beautiful Mind,' should have easily figured out that he w...

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Funny story: 'A Beautiful Launderette' numbers man found RIP in back of Yellow Cab

'A Beautiful Launderette' numbers man found RIP in back of Yellow Cab

New Jersey - A topnotch mathematician thought to have been the inspiration behind the movie 'A Beautiful Launderette' has been found in a deceased condition inside a crashed New Jersey cab. John Doe Jr and his wife Jane, both 103, were in the bac...

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Funny story: Chinese kid isn't good at math

Chinese kid isn't good at math

A Chinese 5th grader at an elementary school in the Boston-area is apparently last in his class when it comes to math. The student, Chen Wu Zhang, was born in the United States, but his mother and father emigrated to the U.S. from China in 1999.

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Funny story: New Shakespeare Maths For Schools

New Shakespeare Maths For Schools

The Government is introducing a new programme for schools, starting this week. A mix up somewhere in the Ministry of Education has led to the ideas for Maths and Literature being confused. Former Minister of Education, Michael Guv, explained that...

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Funny story: 9 Year Old Solves Centuries-old Math Problem

9 Year Old Solves Centuries-old Math Problem

Fibonacci, OH - A 3rd-grader from Fibonacci, Ohio has solved a mathematical concept that has perplexed mathematicians for centuries. Nine year old Samantha Integral was doing her homework when she overheard her mother talking on the telephone. She h...

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Funny story: Mother's Day Math: As With Every Other Year, Card and Brunch Do Not Erase Pain of Pregnancy and Childbirth

Mother's Day Math: As With Every Other Year, Card and Brunch Do Not Erase Pain of Pregnancy and Childbirth

Kansas City, MO - Despite always on-going efforts to increase the impact of their greeting cards, Hallmark Cards has confirmed that - in the opinions of the thousands of mothers polled each year - none of the cards in their line of Mother's Day cards...

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