Top scientist cools on global warming theory

Written by Jack Battler

Friday, 2 March 2007

NORTH FALLS, MN -- In a odd addendum to the raging global warming debate one of the top scientist who originated the global warming theory has now recanted his former claims that the Earth is warming due to man-made greenhouse gases, Speaking to a group of students and fellow scientists at the University of Minnesota March 1, Dr. Sun Nugun Ziu said he can no longer claim that man is the cause of fluctuations in the global mean temperature.

"The fact is I wish we as a species did have the ability to warm up the planet," Ziu said. "The recent unusually cold weather in these parts could be a thing of the past. A few degrees warmer on average and we could be growing massive crops of farm produce in places like Siberia and other northern regions. Global hunger could be abolished."

In response to sharp criticism by some colleagues attending the talk Ziu responded with contempt, "If you did not have your heads so far up the behinds of the government committees that fund your research to the tune of billions yearly you might be able to actually look at scientific data instead of scare mongering headlines based on political agendas."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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