CHICAGO – (Satire News) – Scientists from Maine to Oregon have expressed that they are not at all happy with the name that NASA officials have chosen for the newly-discovered planet. At a recent conference of the Modern American Scientists Guild,…
AVOCADO HEIGHTS, California – (Satire News) – Planetary scientists now say that the Dixie Land Fire is so gigantic that it can be seen from as far off as Saturn (a distance of over 742 million miles, as the crow flies). The “Fire From Hell” as the…
An anonymous source in Russia has reported that after years of trial and error, scientists have discovered a formula that can shrink an average human down to almost microscopic size. The source also reports that over 10,000 members of the Russian…
A local man announced on Monday that he feels his seasonal depression gets worse and worse every year, and scientists say this is yet another effect of global warming. Michael Blackstone, 31, says that his depression is most severe when daylight…
Beijing, China- A brilliant Chinese researcher in China named "He Jiankui" grew a micro wormhole into a ten foot high wormhole that was connected to a habitable world in the Alpha Centauri solar system, for the first time ever. As "He Jiankui" s…
The New Scientist magazine has published details of a 'Time Travel' competition, open to anyone resident in the UK. They write: There's much more to time travel than killing Hitler and accidentally causing the end times. As such, we're postponing…
HOUSTON – (Satire News) - Everyone at NASA is extremely shocked at a photo that the Mars Land Rover has just sent back. The photo clearly shows a wooden home with a dog in front of it. NASA scientists are totally baffled at the photo, which the…
MIAMI – Some of the nation’s leading oceanic scientists have commented that it is time we changed the name of sperm whales. The whales were first discovered by Portuguese explorer, Valdivino Bernardo Sperm in late November of 1617. V.B. actuall…
HOUSTON – It is being reported by several publications that experts in the world of planetary science are urging President Trump to change the name of the planet Uranus to Rectalinia. They state that it is time, once and for all, to put an end to...
HOUSTON – NASA has just informed the media that planetary scientists have just made an astounding discovery. The team of scientists, who use the code name, 'the Brainiacs', have announced that they have just discovered a planet that they guess is...
CAIRO, Egypt – A group of celestial scientists at Cairo’s prestigious Sandman University have just made a remarkable discovery. The group leader, Dr. Abudabees Bakmani, informed the Cairo news media that his group has just discovered three pyramid...
Science Town, USA President Donald Trump has spoken out against scientists in his latest statement. He is mad because none of the scientists would validate or verify all the things he made up. "That Danish lady trying to tell me that crazy wind p...
A new study just released by the Institute of Actual Science casts doubt on the validity of the age-old practice of astrology, which seeks to divine information about human character and affairs from the movements and relative positions of celestial...
Science Town, USA Although Trump seems to be an enemy of science, denying global warming, etc., social scientists tracking the mood of the country announced that Trump is good for the country, although he seems to be making lots of wrong moves, resul...
Science Town, USA Ever since Trump took office, a secret organization, the Scientists for Sanity, have been working on a brain ray for Trump. "We knew right away that there was something seriously wrong with Trump the moment he started campaignin...
Science Town, U.S.A. Just as Trump was ready to announce a press conference stating that he had proof that global warming wasn't true, the BBC released a beguiling story. "It seems that Trump kidnapped three of the world's top climatologists and t...
Science Town, USA Scientists, appalled at the thought of Trump becoming President of the U.S., once again began working feverishly on the time machine that they first started when Bush defeated Gore in 2000. "I'm not sure what we could do about Tr...
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