Christian conservative campaigners are hoping that the new HPV vaccine will be too expensive and the old fear of cervical cancer will preserve virginity.
Abstinence advocate, Donna U.Dare explained her approach: "I told my little Donna,do you really want to have those gross things growing in your "down there"? She thought I meant penises at first but then I showed her slides of genital warts caused by the HPV. She said: 'I thought I was a gonna die!'
"I said you could die because HPV causes cervical cancer and that kills lots of women.Then she said: 'Didn't Aunt Lucy have cervical cancer'. And I said mind your goddamn business about my sister!
"So then my little Donna asked:'Can't I get the shot that protects me from HPV?'. And I said that she certainly may NOT and that if she wanted to keep those ugly things from growing downthere should should just keep those gross things from going in downthere.
"She asked me if I let Daddy's gross thing 'down there' and I said that it hadn't been 'down there' since we made our little Donna 11 years ago. Then she asked: 'Is that why Daddy drinks a lot and watches all that porn and is always over at Aunt Lucy's'. And I said: NO Vaccine, NO Penises, No HPV-That's all you need to know!"
Donna U.Dare told our reporter that if only every mom and her daughter had this ability to communicate, there would be a lot more virgins in America.
