Exoplanets Inhabitable? Religious Scholars Have Work To Do

Funny story written by Ralph E. Shaffer

Tuesday, 17 September 2019

image for Exoplanets Inhabitable? Religious Scholars Have Work To Do
It's a big place

When NASA's Exoplanet division released the startling information that as many as 10 Exoplanets in other solar systems may have the capability of sustaining life, the prospect of life on Gj 357d not only excited those who want to escape the daily commute crush on I-5. It also opened an entirely new field of religious scholarship, giving academics a new Ph.D. dissertation topic and preachers a new sermon for Sunday morning.

This won't be a short-lived opportunity. Gj 357d is six million light years away, or about 181 trillion miles. If it takes 6 months to reach Mars, it may take a lifetime to reach that Exoplanet. In the meantime, the scholars at the Falwell's Liberty University will have plenty of time to reconcile Biblical passages with extraterrestrial science. Or to argue against even making the trip, because the Bible has no place for Gj 357d.

At headquarters for Atheists United, there will be joy as they pounce on the existence of our new found Exoplanet and cite the possibility of human life there as proof that there is no God. They can do that as long as NASA hasn't reached a conclusion that Gj 357d doesn't really have water or anything else man would need to survive there.

So this debate will go on until we develop a rocket that can travel 181 trillion miles and land that little rover, as a third or fourth generation of NASA scientists inherit the quest. But by then the question may be moot. Humans may have destroyed life on earth before they can migrate beyond the Moon.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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