Put My Fatwa In Your Jihad, Baby

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Saturday, 28 January 2023

image for Put My Fatwa In Your Jihad, Baby
Mmmm Something Sexy is Goin' On in My Fatwa, Baby

Ah yeah, this is Rasnash Mujahdi spinning all the latest hits across the Arab world, and this one is going out to all the sexy car bombers – flick the switch and blast to the moon, Alice! (an old reference, but a goody) – and don’t spill any on ya, just crank the car radio like it’s the last song you’re ever gonna hear! Cuz it is, bitches!

This is Sanjay Sukadukadurkadurkastreet and his latest hit,

Put My Fatwa In Your Jihad, Baby

Ima gonna
Ima gonna
Ima gonna

Put my fatwa in your jihad
Roll it around
Gonna stick my fatwa in your jihad
Take it to town
Gonna jam my fatwa in your jihad
Buy it by the pound
My fatwa in your jihad’s
Gonna make a loud sound

Open up and say ‘aah-aah-aah!”
Don’t you tell your ma and pa
Swallow all my fatwa
Like you soaped it in the spa

Let me see your jihad
Stinky like a catch of cod
Shake your sexy brown bod
Rub it on my rocket rod

She’s a sexy Taliban
Gotta taste that master plan
Ride the nuke in Iran
Camel toe Afghanistan

Baby you’re my suicide bomb
Shakin’ grenade pom-poms
I won’t ever do you wrong
You like it hard, you like it long

Arab jihad, get me some
Suck that fatwa, yum yum
Persian sweetie bum bum
No more war, let’s have some fun

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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