Justin Trudeau Fly Face Scandal Rocks Canada

Written by Dr. Billingsgate

Friday, 20 September 2019

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Bug Off

BILLINGSGATE POST: Fly Face minstrelsy is an indigenous Canadian theatrical form intended as comic entertainment. Developed in the early 20th century, each show consisted of comic skits, dancing and musical performances that depicted people specifically who had flies hovering over and around their face.

The original Fly Face was a New York attorney named Felixweather Limpp. He had light hair and a wrinkled face. He was heavy-set, and typically wore a bow tie and a sweater vest. He had poor personal hygiene, which resulted in his face being constantly surrounded by a swarm of flies.

In other words, he was a legend who became the inspiration for men like Justin Trudeau, who thought it was cool to go to costume parties where he could score chicks by dressing like Fly Face.

It is common knowledge that chicks love guys with bad pits and odiferous underwear. Otherwise, why do guys who work in carnivals refuse to bathe, going full summers without a shower?

Answer: Chicks consider these odors as being an aphrodisiac.

Then what about the flies? Having flies buzzing around when you are having sex must be a turnoff.

Wrong, Badger breath. Bedbugs are a turnoff. Flies are a turn on. They drive chicks crazy.

Then why does Fly Face wear a Bug Zapper?

Answer: It excites him to see flies get zapped.


Slim: “Is this true?”

Dirty: “Yo, Dude. Can’t wait to try out my new Bug Zapper.”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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