BILLINGSGATE POST: It appears that Slim Everdingle has a chick problem. At first glance, one would think they would be an odd couple; Ocasio-Cortez, a loudmouth commie-Iiberal who advocates the redistribution of wealth, and Everdingle, an integral part of the last threshold of defense against the encroaching Bolshevik hordes.
Everdingle, whose reputation for undercover work preceded the Trump presidency, was the only agent allowed to wear a white tee-shirt and Dickies Short Sleeve Mechanic Coveralls in the White House. Allowing a generous fit in the shoulders and chest, its bi-swing back and elastic waist inserts offered classic comfort and protection for Slim's clandestine operations.
When Alexandria first met Slim, there was magic in the air. What intrigued her most was how accessible Slim’s privates might be because the elastic waist inserts in the Dickies allowed such easy access for her searching hands. When their eyes first met, Slim was looking over the shoulder of his partner, Detrick “Dirty Trick” Detwiler. At the time, Slim was admonishing Detrick for peeling off a battery of popcorn farts.
“That turns chicks off, Dirty. How many times do you have to be reminded?”
“Well, pardon me, asshole.”
Apparently, Ocasio-Cortez had a high threshold for flatulence. She sauntered over.
“What’s your name, big guy?”
“Slim, and you?”
“Hi, I’m Alexandria the Great.”
Slim, doing his best Casablanca Bogart imitation:
“This could be start of a beautiful friendship.”