Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job

Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 1 January 2019

image for Spurs Boss Pochettino To Take Up Barcelona Job
Pochettino practising walking with a tray earlier

Mauricio Pochettino, the Tottenham Hotspur coach, who has guided his team to their highest position on football's ladder for 140 years, has announced that he is to leave the club, and is Barcelona-bound.

He will become a waiter in a top hotel.

The Argentinian joined Spurs in 2014, but has always harboured a desire to wait on tables, and has been collecting white shirts to go with his three pairs of black trousers. He has also been spotted through the windows of his north London home, carrying a tray loaded-up with plates and glasses, and regularly practises scribbling food orders - fired at him by his wife - onto a small note pad.

Spurs lack of success on the pitch has meant that Pochettino has been denied the opportunity to 'polish the silverware', something that will not be a problem at his new job in Barcelona.

Prior to his move to White Hart Lane, Pochettino was in charge at Southampton. Whilst there, he took a part-time job, three evenings per week, waiting on tables at a local bistro, and worked two lunchtimes collecting glasses at a pub near the ground.

He told us:

"It's very hard work and long hours, but there are perks in the form of tips."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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