Grumpy, Trumpty, BO-Jumpty, latest global laughing stock join hands in SOLIDARITY GRUMPING!

Written by Jaggedone

Friday, 10 August 2018


The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Grumpy, Trumpty, BO-Jumpty, latest global laughing stock join hands in SOLIDARITY GRUMPING!
Now they've really got something to be 'GRUMPY' about!

The English Premier League starts today with multii-millionaire, greedy, self-centered, Rolls Royce-driving footy superstars, led by a Portuguese MEGA GRUMP. A Portuguese Man-Of-War would be more entertaining!

Grumpy's boys have to play 90 minutes of footy - yes 90 minutes - after being pampered, waxed, massaged, living, flying, and driving, in utter, utter opulence and luxury, but Grumpy insists the poor chaps are not ready for 90 minutes work.

OK, my local rubbish collector, who drives a conked-out Ford Fiesta, flies Ryan Air, lives on a bum council estate, and works his balls off day-in, day-out, with a smile on his face, complains now and then about the filth and crap that people dump on the streets, but is always prepared to put a shift in without GRUMPING!

Trumpty: multi-billionaire, war-mongering moron, and president of the planet, is a miserable twat and certainly not entertaining! His millions of homeless US followers living under highways, bridges, in plastic shelters, with smiles on their faces, suffering day-in, day-out, have more to offer than this bullshitting, pompous, dictator, who knows everything better, especially how to wipe his golden butt!

Bo-Jumpty: well, is he really worth mentioning? A global, manipulating buffoon, whose only object in life is himself! Now, populist Brexiteers and female covered Muslims, how do you feel when such a complete clown joins Jaggedone's elite club of useless laggards, wasters and, grumpy multi-millionaire footy managers who constantly complain how terrible their lives are while my dustman removes my rubbish bin, with a SMILE ON HIS FACE?

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more