Written by Moose

Saturday, 23 May 2015


The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Kelly Carlin Revises George Carlin's List of Words You Can't Say on TV

DAYTON, OH - George Carlin's only daughter, Kelly Carlin, has updated her father's famous list of the "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television".

The first list that George Carlin made was presented in his 1972 monologue "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television". The words are: shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits.

Kelly Carlin's revised list includes 42 words you can never say on television:

1) Shit
2) Piss
3) Fuck
4) Cunt
5) Cocksucker
6) Motherfucker
7) Tits
8) Guys
9) Manpower
10) Freshman
11) Secretary
12) Tomboy
13) Homeless
14) Rich
15) Poor
16) Fat
17) Skinny
18) Blind
19) Dumb
20) Retarded
21) Crazy
22) Lazy
23) Special
24) Dwarf
25) Midget
26) Victim
27) Negro
28) Caucasian
29) American
30) Arab
31) Foreign
32) Illegal
33) Oriental
34) Indian
35) Homosexual
36) Stewardess
37) Policeman
38) Foreman
39) Boys
40) Girls
41) Mothering
42) Fathering

Kelly plans to revise the list soon and will entitle it "The Seven Words You Can Say on Television".

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more