Written by Frankie The J

Friday, 31 July 2009

Hey!

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Man-boobs: They're not just for fatties anymore!
Fr. Francois Dubois, S.J. models his new, frilly, red bra.

The truth revealed
By Fr. Francois Dubois, S.J.

I have never been a tit man, not really, anyway. However, I have been forced to re-evaluate breasts. The reason: I have developed man-boobs. And I am proud of them, but not excessively so. It is not hubris--my new knockers are just plain fun.

I believe my pride at having developed these tiny titties must be much like the pride a young woman feels when the itty-bitty bumpies on her chestie become breasties. Surely, she must sit for hours on end, staring with wonder at her growing knockers. I know I do! And I am gaining insight into the mind set of post pubescent girls.

Do young teenaged girls fondle their breasts? I know I do! Are they as proud as I am that they are quickly outgrowing their training bras? I know I am! Are young women overly concerned over the shape and size of their nipples--if they are perky enough--if they "pout" enough? Lord knows I am!

The growth of my man-boobs has fueled all manner of speculation in me. Is it now time to give up altar boys in favor of women? Now that I have a rack, do I have further need of falsies hidden inside my bra?

I wish I could grow a longer, more flexible neck. If I could lick my own breasts and fellate myself, I'd never have need of a woman again. In fact, I'd never speak to another woman for as long as I lived.

Questions, questions, questions--all I have are unanswered questions. But my man-boobs, they are an answer to prayer.

Pax

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Spoof news topics



Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more