Robert Pattinson Reveals The Behind The Scenes "Sex Secrets" Of "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse"

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 22 February 2011


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image for Robert Pattinson Reveals The Behind The Scenes "Sex Secrets" Of "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse"
Robert Pattinson's bedroom located in his movie soundstage lot trailer.

LOS ANGELES - Robert Pattinson has finally spoken out about the behind-the-scenes 'Sex Secrets' during the filming of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse.

R-Pattz had said that Taylor Lautner and him had made a vow to never reveal the particulars of what had occurred during the filming of the third Twilight Saga installment.

But Pattinson said that since he heard that Lautner had spilled the beans of the behind-the-scenes goings on when he appeared on The Ellen DeGeneres Show that he felt that he could now do the same.

He revealed that he, Lautner, Kristen Stewart, and Ashley Greene had all become very close as the filming on the movie progressed.

He laughed and said that before it was all over he knew secrets about Kristen and Ashley that hardly anyone else in Hollywood knew including that gaylord who claims to know everything about everybody Perez Hilton.

Rob told Tittle Tattle Tonight that Kristen would go to her hair stylist FuFi Fondue twice a month and get a Brazilian Wax Job done on her muffin (biscuit).

He also admitted that once after downing at least six Pomegranate Margarita's Ashley had shown both him and Taylor her tata's and pointed out that the left nipple was a little bit higher than the right nipple.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: That little minor physical problem has since been corrected according to Ashley Greene's gynecologist Dr. Sinclair Notchmeister of Oxnard.]

Rob also revealed that on another occasion Lautner had gotten so drunk that he actually handed Kristen a blue Sharpie pen and asked her to autograph his pecker.

Kristen obliged him and Robby said that you should have heard Taylor scream out at the top of his lungs when Kristen dotted her "i" and crossed her "t."

Another secret that the four agreed not to ever reveal was the fact that they all loved to sit around Kristen's sound stage trailer and play 'Strip Yahtzee,' 'Strip Monopoly,' and 'Strip Dominoes.'

Pattinson also admitted that he has never ever heard a girl snore when she is asleep as loud as Ashley does.

Lautner later confirmed that one night Greene's snoring was so loud that he had to actually turn on the radio to a heavy metal station in order to drown out her snoring so that he could get some sleep.

In other news. A judge in Pocatello, Idaho, has thrown out charges filed by a known stalker, identified as Regazza Holka Bassioballum, 93, who claimed that she was being stalked by President Obama's two little daughters Sasha and Malia.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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