Lady Gaga Gets Makeup Tips from Raccoons Invading NYC

Funny story written by Gail Farrelly

Thursday, 9 September 2010

image for Lady Gaga Gets Makeup Tips from Raccoons Invading NYC
Mirror, mirror, on the wall, which facial mask is the fairest of all?

There have been so many raccoons spotted in New York City lately that a bill has been introduced in the City Council requiring the city to be responsible for trapping these uninvited visitors.

But where some see a menace, entertainer Lady Gaga sees opportunity. She's always been a great fan of facial masks and different kinds of eye makeup; she loves to change her look. Gaga is intrigued by the varied facial masks of raccoons and feels that there's a carryover to her own makeup plans and the cosmetics industry in general.

Of special interest: the black rims that surround the eyes of raccoons. Lady Gaga considers them quite unique, and it's a look she'd definitely like to replicate. She's brought a whole pack of raccoons to live at her offices and serve as consultants for a new cosmetics line she's developing -- a line for the "nature-loving modern woman."

How do the commandeered raccoons feel about this? "Not ecstatic," their representative admits, continuing, "on the other hand, they don't have a lot of options open to them. Having a steady job with Lady Gaga means that they can stay in the city and enjoy a nice lifestyle. They don't face being relocated or being grabbed by a hungry New Yorker eager to whip up a raccoon stew."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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