Derek Hough Breaks Up With Leighton Meester Says He Misses Cheryl Cole

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 10 May 2010


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Leighton told her hair stylist a few days ago that there is just no way Derek will dump her for Cheryl Cole.

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Dancing With The Stars dancer Derek Hough has told his downstairs maid, Markayla Madison, 32½, that he has broken up with electro pop diva - actress girlfriend Leighton Meester.

Markayla who has been Hough's maid at his Hollywood Hills mansion Casa Cha Cha Cha for the past two years said that she was not really surprised because Derek talks in his sleep and she had heard him mention his intention of breaking up with Leighton on three different occasions.

Kay Kay, as her probation officer calls her, smiled and said that a few nights ago she had heard Rekky, as she calls Hough, mention in his sleep that he would soon be dumping Meester.

The twenty-four year old Meester has achieved the Tinsel Town distinction of being known as "Miss CSI" because of the fact she's appeared in episodes of CSI: Chattanooga, CSI: Cheyenne, and CSI: Corpus Christi.

Marky Darky, as Derek affectionately refers to her, said that she knew from the very start that Derek was merely using Leighton to pass the time until his BFF, British singer and X-Factor judge Cheryl Cole can return to America and be with Derek who is so smitten with "Chezza" that he is thinking of having her name tattooed in bold uppercase letters on his (blank).

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Not her whole name Cheryl Cole, just the first three letters Che.]

Madison said that when Cheryl visited Los Angeles this past month Derek was like a little boy in a candy store. And the name of the candy store was Cheryl Cole. Hough tasted this candy and that candy and pretty much most of the candies in the 'fun store.'

Derek also bought Mrs. Cole some very expensive gifts including a diamond watch, pearl earrings, a gold necklace, and a see-thru silver vibrator, which Mrs. Cole nicknamed "The Dancing Dildo" in honor of Derek.

To view quite an astounding array of various sex toys of some of Hollywood's most well known starlets log on to www.thecelluloidworldofdildos.dix

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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