Cheryl Cole Recruits Gaga, Pixie Lott And SuBo For New Girls Aloud Album

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Sunday, 4 April 2010

image for Cheryl Cole Recruits Gaga, Pixie Lott And SuBo For New Girls Aloud Album
63" - That's About 5'3" By Our Reckoning.

With uncertainty clouding the issue of whether or not Girls Aloud will all be able to gather in one place to work on the new album they're under contract to make, Cheryl Cole has arranged for replacement singers in case of emergencies.

The other four Girls Aloud members will have stand-ins recruited in their places should they be unable, for whatever reason, to attend recording sessions.

Lady Gaga, Pixie Lott and SuBo are the headliners in the first batch of replacements who will probably perform on the new album, although some initial doubts were raised regarding dressing SuBo in fishnet stockings and a basque for the publicity shots and the video.

It's thought that Chezza also had some stern Geordie words for Lady Gaga, because she doesn't want Beyonce involved in the video shoot because it would probably descend into the realms of another lesbian lickathon porno romp like the Telephone video.

Cheryl told us that the Telephone video had caught a lot of flack from the British intelligentsia, who considered it the nadir of good taste. And Cheryl didn't want that kind of thing for the Girls Aloud project. Which she insisted should be reet squeaky clean and that.

Warnings were also issued to lunatic fringe members of the SuBo fan club to stay away, because the project would be exclusively a Girls Aloud vehicle, and not a SuBo thing.

Cheryl Cole is still only 5'3" but can sometimes be a bit taller if she stretches.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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