Alex Reid Warns Peter Andre

Funny story written by Hartley

Tuesday, 9 March 2010

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Come on Alex, open wide

The second husband belonging to supermodel Katie Price, Alex Reid, has today sent a message containing a stark warning her first husband, Peter Andre.

Cross-dressing Reid, Katie's most recent marriage acquisition, did not attend the press conference himself, but allowed his wife to deliver the message to the press.

Speaking at her daily Pricey conference in LA, she said, "I have here a message off my lovely, lovely new husband who I love very much and it's proper genuine - OK??? Alex says ...
Oi Pete, stop being in love with my bird, she ain't yours no more she's mine and I love her proper - right? I told you last week in my magazine column I am more muscly than you. Don't forget it - I can crush you Mr. Sixpack, so move on or else. She's gonna be preggers with a mini-me soon so deal with it you muppet."

The message comes after unknown stylist Baddy Form revealed last week that she thinks Peter still loves Kate. Baddy claimed to have fallen in love with Peter Andre during a recent fling she had with him, despite also claiming he incessantly talks about his ex-wife. Baddy was devastated and heartbroken when her relationship with Andre ended, so she sold her story to a tabloid, and did an accompanying glamour shoot to cheer herself up.

Peter Andre, who contrary to some reports is not in hiding, said, "I'm a bit bewildered by all this. If Alex wanted to say something to me why didn't he just call? Seems a bit OTT to have a press conference. Baddy told the papers I still love Kate, which isn't true, and Alex has believed it. Honestly Alex mate, you have no worries on that score at all."

Price was said to have been later seen spoon-feeding Alex as she prepared him for the next instalment of her master-plan.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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