Sweden's Sexy Speed Skater Ivana Phuque Admits She Dated Tiger Woods But Swears It Was Platonic

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 25 February 2010

image for Sweden's Sexy Speed Skater Ivana Phuque Admits She Dated Tiger Woods But Swears It Was Platonic
The Swedish speed skating sensation admitted dating Tiger Woods but says she never even saw his 'putter.'

VANCOUVER - One of the most popular speed skaters in the history of the Winter Olympics, Ivana Phuque from Sweden has admitted that she did in fact date Tiger Woods during the summer of 2009.

The director of Public Relations Governing and Steering Committee, Nicolas Saint Caledonia, said that Miss Phuque did reveal her relationship with Mr. Eldrick Tont Woods on the pre-Olympics questionnaire sheet.

The questionnaire sheet asks if the Olympian has had any out of the ordinary relationships with any out of the ordinary celebrities, sports figures, or politicians.

Mr. Saint Calendonia stated that Miss Phuque did admit to going out with Mr. Woods on at least 16 or so different occasions. Phuque, who is a fellow countrymen of Elin Nordegren, Tiger's wife, did stress however that each of the 16 or so dates were of the 'non-sexual' variety.

The stunning blonde Swedish speed skater did admit to the Vancouver press that she only allowed the golf legend to get to first base and to second base.

When she was asked by a reporter for Britain's BBC if Tiger had gotten to third base, she blushed and replied, "I vill admit that ya, Mr. Voods did try ta get ta third base. I cannot deny dat, but I vill say dat Mr. Voods vas like dey say in American baseball thrown out trying to steal third ya."

The entire Olympic news corps broke out in laughter and started chanting Phuque! Phuque! Phuque!

For further reading on the Swedish speed skating team as well as on its sexy superstar speed skater Ivana Phuque log on to www.sexysexysexyivanaphuque.yum

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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