Newlywed Kevin Jonas Promises His Wife He Well Never Ever Play Golf

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 22 December 2009

image for Newlywed Kevin Jonas Promises His Wife He Well Never Ever Play Golf
The Cabo San Lucas Beach, which was founded in 1493.

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - The honeymooning newlywed groom Kevin Jonas, one-third of the Jonas Brothers, has made a promise to his new bride, Danielle, that he will never ever play golf.

A relieved Danielle heaved a sigh of relief and told him that she really and truly appreciated him making that commitment.

She said that it showed true dedication to their marriage. Kevin pointed out that he knows full well from reading People Magazine, US Magazine, and watching Entertainment Tonight that playing golf can easily lead to other things, such as infidelity, adultery, and losing half of all your friggin' money.

The happy couple had a grand old time frolicking in the warm waters off the Cabo San Lucas coast. Cabo San Lucas was founded in 1493, by three of Christopher Columbus's sailors, Carlos Cabo, Lorenzo San, and Johnny Lucas.

The three took out a loan in May of 1494, to make some much needed renovations to their 3,000 square foot hacienda, Casa De Las Maracas.

But sadly the trio defaulted on their loan. The hacienda was repossessed by The Pinata Realty Company of Nuevo Laredo, Mexico and sold to a Chinese investment firm.

In current brochures on Cabo San Lucas, the origin of the town name does not mention the three Italian sailors. Instead, it lists that the name Cabo San Lucas is of Chinese origin and translated into English means Cape Saint Chinese Candy.

Kevin Jonas was asked what his favorite Mexican dish was and he replied that he really liked the Frijoles Borachos, which translated means Drunken Beans. He asked if that meant that the beans contained beer.

When he was informed that yes, beer is added to the beans, he quickly stood up, put his hand to his mouth, and started running towards the outside escusado (toilet).

SIDENOTE: Kevin is presently being treated at The Frito Bandido 24-Hour Clinic, where doctors say that he is almost fully recovered from second degree acute shock.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more