Neighbourhood Kids Boycott Local McDonalds; Lockdown in Effect

Funny story written by codyrockin

Sunday, 6 April 2025

image for Neighbourhood Kids Boycott Local McDonalds; Lockdown in Effect
A picture of Harold Jook Tzetziki, who often is seen doing bad things with his pal Zim.

Today, a McDonald's in Pondview has closed after some 13-year-old boys decided to destroy it.

"Neighbourhood hooligans, that's what they were," says Michael Groth, a mathematics teacher of the involved delinquents at Woodville Public School. "The spiky-haired one always does stupid stuff, and the other just acts super snarky."

Police have identified the suspects as Zimran Clark Tomson and Harold Jook Tzetziki, well known for pulling pranks and causing trouble wherever they went. The two allegedly barged into the McDonalds and demanded that the menu's prices be lower, the burger patties thicker, and the bathrooms cleaner. When an employee told the kids to stop fooling around, all hell broke loose.

"It was super unexpected," she said when questioned about the affair. "The two went into the kitchen and started destroying everything-the blonde did most of the hijinks, and the brunette wrote on the wall."

The teens have spilled hot oil on the floor and thrown flaming patties around to the exasperation of the workers. One called the police, who arrived on the scene to confiscate the teenagers.

Currently, it is undisclosed what will happen to the duo, but they're estimated to be put in juvenile detention for 1 month due to vandalism and violence.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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