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Funny satire stories about vandalism

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Funny story: Brick Came Through Window

Brick Came Through Window

An 84-year-old lady, innocently washing her breakfast pots in her kitchen, was given the fright of her life this morning, when a regular household brick came crashing through the window, causing her to turn to her husband, Albert, and ask him: "Wh...

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Funny story: Police baffled at the occurrence of spots all over town

Police baffled at the occurrence of spots all over town

Squaresville police are trying to figure out the meaning of what looks like a new form of vandalism throughout their town. Nearly everything is getting covered with spots. This was first discovered when police officers started getting calls about the...

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Funny story: 'Cock and Balls' man in court again

'Cock and Balls' man in court again

A 44 year old man from Greenfield has once more appeared before Uppermill magistrates accused of drawing an obscene image on a neighbours car. Doug Graves, appearing in court for the third time in six years, was accused of 'drawing a large cock an...

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Funny story: Police Mobilize to Prevent Justin Bieber from Launching More Deadly Egg Attacks

Police Mobilize to Prevent Justin Bieber from Launching More Deadly Egg Attacks

Calabasas, CA Police from all over the Southern California area responded to a five-alarm alert about a deadly egg attack perpetrated by pop star Justin Bieber on the house next door to him. Earlier egg attacks caused $20,000 damage. "We are too...

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Funny story: Deputies Search Of Justin Bieber's Home Fails To Find Any Talent Or Charisma

Deputies Search Of Justin Bieber's Home Fails To Find Any Talent Or Charisma

Sheriff's deputies in California, with a warrant to search the home of teen pop sensation Justin Bieber, came up short and failed to locate any sign of talent nor the remotest sniff of charisma or charm. Investigators with the Los Angeles County S...

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Funny story: Halloween fightback! - Pensioners encouraged to join in the fun!

Halloween fightback! - Pensioners encouraged to join in the fun!

In a recent campaign by Help The Fogies, pensioners are being encouraged to fight back against the youngsters who traditionally terrorise them under the guise of a 'bit of fun'. Traditionally, in America, Trick or Treat is where children and menac...

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Funny story: Los Angeles Declares War On Graffiti

Los Angeles Declares War On Graffiti

LOS ANGELES - The Lost Angeles Police Department has just announced its War on Graffiti program. An LAPD spokesperson, Harry Watkinfaust stated that this vandalistic act of tagging buildings, houses, and even automobiles is going to be stopped.

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Funny story: Butter Cow Vandal Caught Red Handed

Butter Cow Vandal Caught Red Handed

Des Moines, Iowa- A member of "Iowans for Animal Liberation", the animal activist group that recently vandalized the butter cow sculpture at the Iowa State Fair, has been caught. William Baston is in police custody and is singing like a canary, or m...

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Funny story: Vandals move the Easter Island Heads

Vandals move the Easter Island Heads

Archaeologists are up in arms after it has been revealed that the famous Heads on Easter Island have been moved. "It's a travesty," said Jenny Spinner, the archaeologist in charge of the treasures of the South Pacific. "The Heads are a crucial par...

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Funny story: Denuded nudes display needs new dudes

Denuded nudes display needs new dudes

Vandals have destroyed hundreds of thousands of pounds worth of sculptures at the Liverpool Tate Modern. "We're devastated," said Tate Head of Acquisitions, Pauline Quirk. "These were tasteful nudes created by Tracy Emin. What these bastards have...

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Funny story: Local Ploughing Match Ruined By Villager

Local Ploughing Match Ruined By Villager

Anger took hold within the local farming community this weekend, when a vandal ruined their annual ploughing match. The event, designed to reward the best ploughmen for their craft, was to be held in fields just outside a small village in Kent on...

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Funny story: Stones Guitarist Disowns Daughter

Stones Guitarist Disowns Daughter

Rolling Stones legend Keith Richards has formally disowned daughter Theodora after she was arrested for drug possession and drawing graffiti on the side of a convent in Lower Manhattan. By the time, I was Theodora's age, I'd been busted 7 times for drugs and had even done a stretch in the Scrubs - and it wasn't just for a couple of narco tabs , if you know what I mean. And as for getting li...

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Funny story: Scotland Yard chief Sir Paul Stephenson, admits 'psychological contract' with the public is broken.

Scotland Yard chief Sir Paul Stephenson, admits 'psychological contract' with the public is broken.

Scotland Yard, London: An example of what Scotland Yard chief Sir Paul Stephenson, admits as the 'psychological contract' with the public being broken, is when a tin of pink emulsion paint dumped over a two-year old silver Chevrolet and the deflatio...

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Funny story: Foreign Banks suffer accidental hate campaign

Foreign Banks suffer accidental hate campaign

Branches of several foreign banks have been suffering a concerted attack of vandalism, excrement smeared on windows and pushed into the night deposit boxes after severe dyslexic anarchist, Mary Hinge, joined the Anti-British National Party Organisati...

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Funny story: G20 Protestor Angered to Find His Car Vandalized

G20 Protestor Angered to Find His Car Vandalized

Pittsburgh, PA - A G20 protestor returning to his car from a busy day of protesting capitalism found his car with a smashed window and missing its radio. Troy Kleagle of Portland, Oregon had driven himself and three other activists across the co...

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Funny story: Scotland Vows To Stop Graffiti Vandals

Scotland Vows To Stop Graffiti Vandals

GLASGOW, Scotland - The director of the Scottish People's Anti-Vandalism League Glenbuck Dumfries has stated that acts of vandalism involving graffiti have now reached epidemic proportions. He pointed out that vandals are spray painting schools, b...

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Funny story: Apostrophe Apostasy: Retired Gordon Highlander declared "Vandal" in Royal Tunbridge Wells

Apostrophe Apostasy: Retired Gordon Highlander declared "Vandal" in Royal Tunbridge Wells

ROYAL TUNBRIDGE WELLS (TS.com) - Stefan Gatward, a 62-year old resident of St. John's Close in Tunbridge Wells served with distiction as a solider in the Gordon Highlanders Regiment in the 1960's. He yet fights the good fight, so to speak, as he...

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