BALD KNOB, Arkansas - (Satire News) - The FBI conducted a pre-dawn raid on the Wigged Out Weasel wig emporium on Hirsute Boulevard.
Federal officers confiscated over 189 different types of wigs, toupees and merkins, many imported from Denmark, Japan, and Philadelphia.
According to sources close to the investigation, police received a tip that the factory was using hair obtained from human cadavers to make wigs. The informant, identified by the cops as "Mr. Big Wig," said the owner was paying morticians to collect hair from bodies that had been recently embalmed.
"We take the illegal wig trade very seriously," said FBI spokesperson Robert Pin."It's a despicable business that preys on the most vulnerable, and cold, in society."
The agents also found 53 kilos of highly refined Colombian cocaine in tubs labeled wig powder.
But Officer Bobby is more concerned about the hairy situation going down at the wig emporium.
Pin commented, with the tiniest of a telling smile, "The coke is nothing to be sniffed at, but rest assured officers are combing the scene thoroughly for clues."
