MAR-A-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – iRumors has divulged that ex-president Donald Trump, aka the former Divider-in-Chief, is actually totally bald. Trump’s hairstylist, his personal nurse, his sex therapist, and girlfriend, Maria Bartiromo, we…
ATLANTA – (Satire News) - Every national news media organization is saying that Kelly Loeffler looked like a cross between a zombie, Ann Coulter, and a Stepford Wife. Many who watched the Georgia Television Debate between “Hairzilla” Loeffler and…
Reports of the Man-bun, once the preserve of post pseudo-hipsters (real hipsters wouldn’t be seen dead with one), migrating to the heads of middle-aged men in lockdown, has resulted in ‘Questions in the House’. As barbers and hairdressers return t…
After a weekend of unseasonable gusty weather, it's been revealed that the wind was so strong in one part of the country, that it blew one man's hair into a middle parting. Russell Bonkers was on his way to the barber shop near where he lives in S…
The Coronavirus Lockdown is finally over, for some businesses, and, as hairdressers got back to work last week complete with their face masks, it became apparent that many in the trade have 'branched out' into other areas of the hospitality trade.
After his first trip to the hairdresser in four months, Stan Bridgewater was cruelly reminded of the fact that he is going bald. The formerly hirsute office junior, 47, brushed his hair once, and left it at that, knowing that it would continue to…
A man whose hair needed a trim has had the operation performed by his brother-in-law, it's been reported. The incident happened late yesterday afternoon in the breezy back garden of Moys Kenwood, 56, who had been taking a 10-minute exercise stroll...
DUCKWATER, Nevada – Bernie Sanders was campaigning in Duckwater, Nevada, which is famous for being the only city west of the Mississippi River that Mrs. Abraham Lincoln ever visited. Sanders was interviewed by a reporter with The Las Vegas Citizen...
With Brexit done, Parliament has turned its attention to central questions of British life. Boris Johnson's Facial Hair Bill, however, has been given a short back and sides at the Committee Stage by the House of Lords. "Incomprehensible," moped th...
There was annoyance on a grand scale this morning when an Englishman living in the Thai capital of Bangkok took four attempts to successfully pick up a hair from the floor. The hair, one of the few that are left on the head of Moys Kenwood, 48, ha...
Bangkok, Thailand - A man who allowed his wife to cut his hair was left ruing his decision today, after the enterprise went disastrously wrong, and had to be put right by a visit to someone who knew what he was doing. Moys Kenwood, 51, of Bangpako...
A man who had told anyone who would listen, he "couldn't give a fuck" about the bald patch atop his cranium, has now told those close to him, if it gets any bigger, he won't hesitate to: "lop the fucking lot off!" The man, whose identity is be...
Breaking: That the immaculate Emmanuel Macron, President of France, would find a rejoinder to Mr. Trump goes without saying. The two are currently discussing the nuclear disarmament deal with Iran and whether to modify it or drop it. Review: A...
Amanda Jenkins only wants one thing, and that is to be able to attend school. However, that presents a challenge for her. Jenkins was born with green hair. "Amanda was born with a difference in how her hair follicles use minerals such as titanium...
They might be on the same wave length as far as politics go, but they are a million miles away from each other when it comes down to hair! Geert Wilders, huge fan of Donald, and vice versa, Donald loves Geert, have many things in common, HATE, HAT...
In Pennsylvania yesterday Melania Trump, the wife of GOP candidate Donald Trump, gave a speech which said, in part, "America has become "too mean and too rough," and that as first lady she would attempt to correct this national defect. This promp...
Facebook have decided to show a unique insight into the bald life of superstar footballer, Wayne Rooney, tonight! They will be live-streaming his road to baldness live and there will even be close-ups of several attempts to reconstruct his thinning,...
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