Harvey Weinstein will soon be released from prison, but not due to good behavior or pulling political strings, but because Hollywood wants him to produce his own life story!
“I’m Just A Lonely Boy: The Harvey Weinstein Story” will depict Harvey as a sympathetic soul who was just lonely, thinking no one liked him, that he just wanted to love and be loved, despite his “pick-up technique” being a little too aggressive.
The film is expected to rake in about $4 billion around the world, with tons of real and potential rapist in high places and big money (name names? Who’s very rich right now and not in a jail cell? There’s your answer) so that Harvey can retire in solitude to reflect on his life and career.
He has already been given the secret address of a Caribbean island owned by the Trump Corp. where Harvey can settle in and drink and eat and snort and fuck to his heart’s content … but, alas, he will be banned from ever stepping foot on American soil! Not even if his masterpiece wins all the Oscars (they’re not fixed, okay! So stop saying they are – Next Story: The Oscars Are Fixed!)
Did you think there was just one pedo island? Hell no! They got tons of them all around the world! And you’re not invited. Unless you’re willing to kiss the ring of King Harvey and get a special invite.
Bill Gates already has a cabana booked from now to the rest of his life.
