WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - One of the oldest senators in congress, Marsha Fifi Blackburn, who is 69, but looks 79, stated that contrary to what Fox News resident rodent Greg Gutfeld said she does not swing for the other team.
Blackburn was addressing the recent rumors that her and Cong. Marjorie Taylor Greene were recently caught in one of the congressional female bathrooms in a lip lock embrace that would put Kim Kardashian and her passionate lover Pete Davidson to shame.
Blackburn, who never seens to bother to color her black-as-night hair roots, says that no matter what Gutfeld, Coulter, or Hannity may say, in her mindful mind she looks and feels like she's 42.
Fellow senator Kirsten Gillibrand [Dem - New York] wasted no time in remarking that apprently "Blacky" (Blackburn) doesn't own a mirror, or if she does the wicked bitch from Tennessee doesn't fucking know how to use it.
Gillibrand, noted that she was not trying to be mean, as she just believes in calling a skanky, mean, heartless banshee bitch, like Marsha, exactly what the fuck she is...an evil, cruel, racist old honky tonk woman.
