San Francisco’s Oldest Prostitute Retires At The Age of 83

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Thursday, 24 February 2022

image for San Francisco’s Oldest Prostitute Retires At The Age of 83
Ms. Nutwood is planning on writing an informative book tentatively titled "Boinking For Fun and Profit"

SAN FRANCISCO – (Satire News) – The oldest prostitute in the history of the “Golden Gate City” has just hung up her douche bag after 63 years in the sexual favors for money business.

Hollywood Innuendo senior writer Fajita San Guacamole, broke the story which has actually not only gone nation-wide but world-wide as well.

She reported that newspapers in such countries as Finland, Malaysia, Ecuador, and Macadamia carried the story.

San Guacamole identified the women of the night (and day) as Millicent Nutwood, who estimated that during her 40-plus years career, she has seen somewhere around 41,000 peckers.

Nutwood noted that she even had the infamous “Pussy Grabber” Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump on several occasions, and she pointed out that out of the 41,000 peters (wieners) she’s serviced, his was definitely one of the smallest and weirdest looking of all.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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