Steven Heckingthwaite has learnt all of the words to Auld Lang Syne, even though he will see the new year in with Jools Holland.
'Yes,' said Steve on his website, 'I am usually one of those superior types who win the Pub Quiz by myself, so I thought I would learn all of the words to Auld Lang Syne so that I could feel self-satisfied that I have actually accomplished something with my year. I mean, my record and CD collection are all in alphabetical order, which is something of an achievement'.
'I have big plans for 2021,' said Steven, 'although, romance never seems to be a part of it, which is a great loss for all womankind.'
Yes, Steven Heckingthwaite is still single. Surprisingly for all of us.
