Sunday, 31 March 2019

image for Australian wildlife show launches

Geoff Grunt is an Australian zoologist whose love of animals has taken him throughout the world. He spoke exclusively to TheSpoof about his new TV series, Wild Fuckers.

“It was an intense year filming that show. We wanted to capture nature in all its glory, so we had to get up close in some pretty dangerous places.”

Geoff himself was attacked by animals on numerous occasions, many of which are captured on film and make up part of the show.

“We were in Africa, and we were filming this cheetah nearby. Then suddenly it came and jumped at me and it might have eaten me, but then at the last minute I punched that fucker right in the face. That’s how you deal with a cheetah.”

Later on, Geoff had a similar near escape with an elephant he was filming and it began to charge at him. “Yeah, always stand your ground with a charging elephant, then at the last minute you punch the fucker right in the face! That’s what I did, I nearly broke my knuckles.”

Back in Australia, Geoff celebrated the completion of his TV show by bringing a live kangaroo to a scout meeting. He is the head of the Australian scouting organisation and often hosts such events.

“The kangaroo was getting pretty jumpy, then this one kid said he wanted to pet the roo. So I said to him, ‘No Bruce, leave the kangaroo alone,’ and I punched that fucker right in the face. He shut up after that.”

Wild Fuckers begins on Channel 6 this Thursday.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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