Huge Snake Crosses Road On Man's Way Home From Work

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Monday, 22 October 2018

image for Huge Snake Crosses Road On Man's Way Home From Work
A snake earlier

There was a fleeting moment of real anxiety for one man as he traveled home from work in Battambang this afternoon, when a huge snake slithered across the road right in front of him, the immediate result of which, was a crude brown skidmark on his underpants.

Moys Kenwood, 55, was the passenger on a motorcycle being driven by his stepdaughter, Helley, 18, when they encountered the beast on the outskirts of Baset village. Kenwood relates what happened next:

"We were doing about 40kph, when suddenly, this snake slithered across the road right in front of us, just like it said up above, in the opening paragraph. It must have been 35ft in length!" he exaggerated.

Having seen snakes before, Helley didn't blink, but her passenger not only blinked, but nigh-on babbed himself as well. Kenwood:

"For a nasty moment, I lost control of my sphincter. I could feel something 'poking its head out'. It 'signed its name', then returned from whence it came, but the damage was done, and they'll definitely need washing."

* NOTE: Snakes rarely attack people, but may do when they feel threatened. If they do, skidmarks are extremely likely.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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