Rihanna May Be Entering A Rehab Clinic

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 10 January 2012


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St. Songstress, the Caribbean Island which Rihanna recently purchased for $7.9 million. (Photo by Rico Chorizo).

ATLANTA - Twenty-three-year-old Rihanna is starting to worry a lot of her family, close friends, and band members.

The Barbados beauty recently finished her Louder Than Loud Concert Tour and the high energy really took a toll on her.

A close unnamed source told Hollywood Innuendo that the singer has been going non-stop since June and that she has been eating all kinds of things that have caused her to feel dizzy and disoriented.

Fajita San Guacamole of HI stated that after a concert at the Ooh La La Convention Center in Chattanooga, Rihanna locked herself in her dressing room and reportedly ate three family size bags of Cheetos all by herself.

The close unnamed source said that when Rihanna emerged 25 minutes later everyone of her fingers were orange, her tongue was orange, her lips were orange, and even her belly button was orange.

Rihanna has stated on several occasions that she is not addicted to Cheetos, but friends and members of Team Rihanna say different.

The Caribbean beauty's bass player says that he does not want to get in trouble but noted that he has seen her stash loose Cheetos in her purse, her makeup bag, and even in her underwear.

The Cheetos compulsion finally came to a head a few days ago when she was late for an interview with Piers Morgan. She finally showed up smelling highly of Cheetos.

After the show her manager sat her down and told her that he wants for her to enter into the Henry and Betty Ford Rehab Clinic to get help for her Cheetos problem.

Rihanna angrily tossed a lipstick at him and yelled out in a Caribbean accent that she is not addicted to Cheetos and that she can quit her orange snack food habit any damn time she wants.

FOOTNOTE: Rihanna was supposed to have appeared on this season's edition of Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice but Trump changed his mind when he saw a video of her going through a family bag of Cheetos in 17 seconds.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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