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Funny story: Lady Gaga Discloses That She Is Changing Her Name

Lady Gaga Discloses That She Is Changing Her Name

NEW YORK CITY - The popular female singer known as Lady Gaga has just informed the music world that she has decided to change her professional name. Lady Gaga, whose real name is Joanne Angelina Germanotta, said that she now realizes that the name...

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Funny story: Demi Lovato Confesses That She Has A Big Crush On Rihanna

Demi Lovato Confesses That She Has A Big Crush On Rihanna

MONTECITO HEIGHTS, California – Demi Lovato has certainly had her share of ups and downs, and she recently spoke with Vox Populi News Agency’s reporter Ichabod Fernandez. Lovato and Fernandez talked at the popular Lower 40 Steak House in Montecito...

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Funny story: Shakira Has Already Had 714 Marriage Proposals Since Performing At The Super Bowl

Shakira Has Already Had 714 Marriage Proposals Since Performing At The Super Bowl

CHICAGO – Shakira was in Chicago to perform at a sold-out concert at The Al Capone Commemorative Coliseum. She talked to Ipso Facto Illustrated Magazine reporter Sigmund Cottonseed. The Colombian firecracker, who is 43, told him that, since her a...

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Funny story: Taylor Swift Says That Tennessee Senator Marsha Blackburn Is Downright Evil

Taylor Swift Says That Tennessee Senator Marsha Blackburn Is Downright Evil

NASHVILLE - Taylor Swift is not the least bit shy when it comes to pointing out that Tennessee Senator Marsha “The Plump Trump Ass-Kisser” Blackburn has gone and stepped in a pile of Tennessee thoroughbred horse manure (or shit, as they call it in Ar...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Receives Bad News Over Telephone Line

Nashville Man Receives Bad News Over Telephone Line

Last evening, as the shadows were growing longer and the sun was on the verge of giving up hope completely, singer-songwriter Luke Crosby of Nashville, Tennessee, received some extremely bad news over the telephone line: he learned that his baby had...

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Funny story: Trump stands down (and then up again)

Trump stands down (and then up again)

Crooners International stand proud today when President Trump announces his real calling in life and the fact he finally feels happy talking about his true vocation: Crooning. We spoke to an insider who risked his job (so we can’t say who) but nee...

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Funny story: Before Prince's death, on average, people last thought about singer 7 1/2 years ago: study

Before Prince's death, on average, people last thought about singer 7 1/2 years ago: study

HARFOLD, Vt. - As the world mourns the death of singer Prince, who died this week due to complications following an overdose, Harfold State College has released a startling finding. Although most of the Western world has been rendered incapacitate...

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Funny story: Lady Gaga Rips Out Tony Bennett's Rotator Cuff

Lady Gaga Rips Out Tony Bennett's Rotator Cuff

New York, NY - Crooner Icon, Tony Bennett, had to undergo emergency rotator cuff surgery on his right shoulder this week, and reps for the 89-year-old singer are squarely blaming new sidekick, Lady Gaga, for the debilitating ailment. The two singers...

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Funny story: Lana Del What?

Lana Del What?

Lana Del Ray (no, we don't know who she is either) has sensationally admitted to sleeping her way around the music industry. The singer (?) said: "I have slept a lot of guys in the industry but none of them helped me get my record deals." Learning of this amazing news BATTL news hastily arranged a interview with her to find out the truth behind the statement. We also took a guitar along...

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Funny story: The Coca-Cola Company Still Hasn't Built the World a Home

The Coca-Cola Company Still Hasn't Built the World a Home

Atlanta, GA, USA - Despite a decades-long effort, the Coca-Cola company has not yet built the world a home or taught the world to sing in perfect harmony. The company's efforts began in 1971 with a television commercial featuring a multi-cultural gro...

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Funny story: Miley Cyrus Talks About Her Sunburn, Her Butt Bruise, and Her Twerking

Miley Cyrus Talks About Her Sunburn, Her Butt Bruise, and Her Twerking

TAMPA, Florida - It appears that Miley's parents never told their little moneymaker about sunblock. The "Wrecking Ball" singer took to the sun and sand and ended up with sunburn and a Picasso painting shaped bruise on her caboose. Miley was ask...

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Funny story: Hank Williams Jr. Says He's Changed

Hank Williams Jr. Says He's Changed

"Mary Jane and me may get married again as she's the best wife I ever had," Hank Williams Jr. told a friend the other day so we sent over someone to see him, if he was in shape to talk. "Yeah, I might as well tell the world stupid world that it wa...

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Funny story: Madonna Admits That Cellulite Gives Her Character

Madonna Admits That Cellulite Gives Her Character

NEW YORK CITY - The singer who sang "Papa Don't Preach" has just admitted something that she has been denying for years. The Material Grandmother told Pia Confetti with Celebrity Globe that she can no longer deny the fact that the dreaded cottage...

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Funny story: Pharrell Williams Was Asked Not To Wear His Silly-Looking Smokey The Bear Hat At The Academy Awards Show

Pharrell Williams Was Asked Not To Wear His Silly-Looking Smokey The Bear Hat At The Academy Awards Show

HOLLYWOOD - Pharrell Williams was nominated for an Oscar for his song "Happy" from the movie Frozen. Before the show started Williams was asked by an executive with the Academy Awards Show that they did not want him to wear his bent up Smokey the...

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Funny story: Miley Cyrus Admits She May Be A Serial Female Kisser

Miley Cyrus Admits She May Be A Serial Female Kisser

LOS ANGELES - Well Miley Cyrus finished the month of February at 2 for 2. The unofficial twerking champion of the USA earlier locked lips with Katy Perry and now she has engaged in a deep French kiss with fellow singer Brooke Candy. When Miley...

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Funny story: Katy Perry: John Mayer And I Are Over - And This Time I Really, Really, Really, Mean It!

Katy Perry: John Mayer And I Are Over - And This Time I Really, Really, Really, Mean It!

LOS ANGELES - Katy Perry could have saved herself a lot of time, money, and heartache if she had only listened to 17 or so of her friends and relatives and realized that John Mayer is a loser with a capital L. Katy should have gathered that the du...

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Funny story: Mariah Carey's Marriage Is Hitting Some Sour Notes

Mariah Carey's Marriage Is Hitting Some Sour Notes

BEL AIR, California - Word coming out of the Mariah Carey - Nick Cannon household is that the May - December couple's musical marriage has been hitting some awfully flat notes of late. A close friend of the couple said that after five years of wed...

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