There is exciting news that a celebrity is to appear on this year's lack-of-reality TV series, "Celebrity Big Brother".
The celebrity - who can't be named for legal reasons as well as for reasons of sheer embarrassment - joins the show after her career failed to gain lift-off following appearance after appearance on Strictly Come Singing Got Talent on Ice.
The celebrity, who will be appearing with other even less-known celebrities on the show, all of whom are essentially filling in time between their personal appearances as some of the country's top JobCentres, has promised to donate her appearance fee to her bank account.
There is a twist to this year's show in as much as the participants don't actually have to say anything. They just either sit there with a vacuous expression on their face, read the Daily Desmond, or just try to get into each other's beds.