Top 10 Ways to Coax Alex Rodriguez off the Yankees
The Bronx - - The New York Yankees appear to have had enough of Alex Rodriguez. They don't like the way he "talks the talk." They don't care for the way he "walks the walk." But what really upsets them is how his contract will "yank the bank" if...
Read full storyPolice have tazered kids, but it's an act of kindness
British Police have multi - tazered University Students, now it appears they have tazered kids, teenagers of 14. 'It's really just to give them a light reprimand, as opposed to being shot dead', says DCI Jonny Tennyson 'We are issued with bulle...
Read full storyDrinking Water may trigger Depression
Scientists are asking if water, though the purest liquid one can imbibe, may possibly cause brain chemical imbalance, leading to Depression. 'It may even be, that, getting drunk on alcohol is actually better, for maintaining optimism and not actu...
Read full storyPresident Obama directs Defense Secretary to make US Military all transgender force
WASHINGTON, DC - The Obama administration has sent signals in recent days that it is moving toward a decision to mandate an all-transgender military. Defense Secretary Ash Carter said during a visit to Inyorbutistan that an all-transgender force w...
Read full storyNew Research proves "The Price is Right" causes Brain Damage
"The ONLY question we have is - whether ONLY brain damaged people watch it - OR -the show causes it?" said Dr. Moishe Pipick -head of The Worldwide Neurological Center in Berne, Switzerland. He continued:"The evidence is absolutely conclusive - these folks either come to the show part nutsy -or are driven that way - probably it's a combo effect!" "Another amazing finding is that when put thr...
Read full storyKeystone Pipeline Passage Requires Obama To Have Bunghole Re-bored
BILLINGSGATE POST: Press Secretary Josh Earnest told reporters that the only way that the Keystone Pipeline would be passed is if it first goes through President Obama. One intrepid reporter asked if the President's bunghole was big enough to a...
Read full storyEddie Murphy's disease causes strange SNL appearance
Rumors have recently been circulating as to the odd appearance by Eddie Murphy at the Saturday Night Live 40 year anniversary show. An employee at NBC has leaked information that may shed some light on the situation. It seems that Murphy suffers f...
Read full storyBieber's Babe Pecker Shock!
Latest reports suggest Justin Bieber has been mocking girls in LA bars by proclaiming "I have a johnson, you haven't!" However Bieber did get as much back when one of his targets raised "her" dress and replied "yes I have sweety, what do you want...
Read full storyHot Yoga Blamed for Global Warming
A new study by the Weston A. Price Foundation (WAPF), a nonprofit "nutrition" organization with close ties to the meat industry, blames "hot yoga" for global warming. The WAPF report has created a lot of additional heat for Bikram Yoga founder Bi...
Read full storyObama Seeks Balance by Displaying Nobel Peace Prize Alongside Kill List
A recently leaked National Security Agency recording of a therapy session between President Barack Obama and his personal therapist revealed that Obama, in an effort to achieve mental and emotional balance, has decided to display the Nobel Peace Priz...
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