GOP Presidential Hopeful Thinks Earth May Be Flat
Presidential aspirant Senator Marco Rubio (R-Fl) responded recently to a question from GQ about the age of the earth: The Tea Party darling said, "I'm not a scientist, man. I can tell you what recorded history says, I can tell you what the Bible s...
Read full storyNavy Projectile Flies 27 Times Speed of Sound
The U.S. Navy's latest innovation comes in the form of a 23-pound projectile that can fly at twenty-seven times the speed of sound. It is launched from what is called a "rail gun." That's fast enough to travel from New York City's Empire State Bu...
Read full storyThe Cell Cycle: Development of a Productive Life
Life begins when the alarm of my fully charged cell phone shouts, "Hit snooze, hit snooze! Just five more minutes. Sleeping five more minutes won't hurt anyone. Trust me, I'll wake you up again." Five minutes later, my cell phone, Ringo, screams, "It's time, time to open your eyes and do something productive. Get up, get dressed, get ready now!" Ringo is my best friend. He reminds me to do t...
Read full storyJimmy Fallon Revealed To Be In Mid-Fifties
Last night, Jimmy Fallon made a joke that totally bombed. He was booed, during his monologue, when Fallon talked about the possible gender of Chelsea Clinton's baby. "If it's a girl, it will get some of Chelsea's old hand-me-downs. And if it's a...
Read full storyKansas Legislature Considers Bill Requiring Bras On Dairy Cattle
Topeka, KS (Kansas City Star) - The Kansas state House of Representatives is currently debating bill HB666 that would at its essence require all dairy cows in the state to wear a brassiere. The bill was introduced by Representative Prudence Uptight,...
Read full storyBrit soak's sudden pavement slip RIP...or was he pushed?
New York - Well oiled after attending a West 46th St club bash involving loads of booze UK travel writer and elephant obsessive Mark Shand has been reported dead this evening after a mishap involving some treacherous New York pavement slabs. Frie...
Read full storyCardinal Dolan Arrested For Theft Of Contraceptives
In response to Cardinal Nolan's erroneously saying that contraceptives can be purchased at 7-11's and implying that they are available even to poor women, the National Coalition of American Nuns has established a Women's Health Center North of 100th...
Read full storyCardinal Searches For Condoms At 7-11's
Sunday, On National Television, Cardinal Timothy Dolan of New York said, "Contraceptives, that are now widely available -- my Lord, all you have to do is walk into a 7-11 or any shop on any street in America and have access to them -- is that right...
Read full storyRyan Giggs Eyeing Teenage Talent
Temporary Manchester United manager Ryan Giggs is said to have his eye on a lot of teenage talent, according to reports from Manchester. Giggs is especially interested in 19 year old Kirsty Brown and 18 year old Kelly Goodwin, whom he met outside...
Read full storyFlo to Use Charm to 'Perk-Up' Obamacare
Flo, the permanently perky face of Progressive Insurance, has been named new Secretary of Health and Human Services replacing outgoing HHS czar Kathleen Sebelius. President Obama made the announcement last night. The decision was a tough one and P...
Read full storyManchester United Investigation - Purple Lizard People Cause of Not Winning
Manchester United's descent into mediocrity is due to a plague of purple lizard humanoids. David Ike, not to be confused with David Icke or David Moyes phoned the Spoof's Manchester United Crisis phone line this morning offering his services as co...
Read full storyBakery delivery boy wins Tour De France
A BAKERY delivery boy from Yorkshire has won the Tour De France two months before it is due to begin. Slowly pushing a bicycle up a hill to the tune of 'Going Home' from Dvorak's 9th Symphony, Peter Leyland passed the finish line in Harrogate as e...
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