Psst! Wanna buy a Brit footbal club from Mohammed Fayed?
Florida - Jacksonville Jaguars owner Shahid Khan has splashed out a reported $302 million on Fulham Football Club in a deal described by the City as 'deeply machiavellian' even by Brit standards. Notorious hoaxer Fayed has claimed ownership of the...
Read full storyPolish vampire grave could spell end of Pope John Paul II sainthood bid
Wadowice, Poland - An archaeological dig under Karol Wojtyla's family home in Poland has turned up remains of a vampire mausoleum where many of the late Pope's relatives are believed to be buried. Geologists working on the 13th century site found...
Read full storyEthiopian Screamliner incinerated in scorching Heathrow heatwave
London - The Queen of Sheba jet had to be hosed down with one million gallons of fire retardant after virtually vaporizing itself at Heathrow Airport today. The Fallopian Airlines Boeing 787 Screamliner jet which had been enroute from Addis Ababa...
Read full story'Pope's cassock was bugged' says Edward Snowden as Vatican offers asylum
Rome - Revelations Chapter 666, page 9/11 about covert buggery of Paypal [sic] vestments have triggered an offer of Holy Sanctuary to the US fugitive from justice who could be fast-tracked to sainthood if he accepts the Vatican citizenship offer.
Read full storySnowden Now Advising Russia's FSO at Club Formulation
The Guard Dog has just learned that additional to his conference with Amnesty International requesting asylum in Russia Edward Snowden is now advisor to Russia's Federal Guard Service (FSO). As cover, Mr. Snowden has adopted a new disguise as fema...
Read full storyNina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder Are Back For Season 5 On The Vampire Diaries
HOLLYWOOD - The sleepy little town of Mystic Falls, Virginia is once again brimming with the hustle and bustle of it's inhabitants on the CW blockbuster hit The Vampire Diaries. The main cast member who portrays Elena Gilbert, Nina Dobrev sat down...
Read full storyWyoming Will Soon Ban The Age Old Practice of Bear Teasing
CHEYENNE, Wyoming - The Wyoming State Senate has just passed a law that will ban the extremely dangerous practice of bear teasing. Senator ZonQuisha Popcorn [D-Laramie] told the assembled media that this piece of legislation should have been passe...
Read full storyJohnny Depp Shocked As The Lone Ranger Bombs
LOS ANGELES - Johnny Depp has told a very close friend that he feels like going into the Witness Protection Program. Depp made that comment after his latest film The Lone Ranger appears headed for the last roundup. The actor who just turned 50,...
Read full storyTina Turner To Be A Blushing Bride At 73!
NEW YORK CITY - A spokesperson for Tina Turner has stated that the "What's Love Got To Do With It" singer will soon be headed for wedded bliss in Switzerland where she resides. The 73-year-old firecracker of a singer/dancer says that she is going...
Read full storyGovernor Brewer Angrily Shuts Down Arizona's Last Cork Producing Factory
YUMA, Arizona - The governor of the hot-as-hell state of Arizona has just informed the news media that she regrets having to shut down the state's only cork manufacturing factory. The governor said that the Yuma-based company named Put A Cork In I...
Read full storyJustin Bieber Might Be Charged With Indecent Exposure
NEW YORK CITY - The New York City Police Department has just announced that Canadian singer Justin Bieber could possibly end up being hit with indecent exposure charges. An NYPD spokesperson told The iRumors News Agency that two individuals have c...
Read full storyPrince William Torn Between A Rock and A Hard Place
NEW YORK CITY - Prince William recently flew to New York City to visit with a publishing company about a book that he has been asked to write. While in America, William met with Tilapia Frisbee of The Right Coast Revue. The two had lunch at The...
Read full storySarah Palin Reveals What Her Pride and Joy is
WASILLA, Alaska - Sarah Palin is thrilled that she has just been given a job at FOX News. She told GOPicky Magazine that she feels that she like the FOX Netowrk slogan is fair and balanced. She smiled and said "Well ya know maybe at times I ai...
Read full storyLindsay Lohan Turning Into A Rehab Mess
LOS ANGELES - One of Lindsay Lohan's fellow rehab clinic patients has just stated that she really fears for the health of the freckle-faced actress. The patient who spoke on grounds of anonymity told Bedroom Pillow Talk's Vodka Vermicelli that Lin...
Read full storyFox Sports Outdoes Fake News Writers: Baseball Wife Throws Wild Curve Ball of Craziness
Just like a competitor in the fake news market in the U.K. recently had as a headline, Sometimes Fake News and Real News are Indistinguishable. Yes, at times the truth is stranger than fiction. Even those who write fake news day-in, day-out, like...
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