Vocational D.N.A, a glimpse of the future.
A recent study has found a link between a certain D.N.A strand and destiny. The astonishing claims were made by Professor Wilmut Strand, Head of the Biological Theology department at Nuneaton university for boys. "We have large amounts of evidence and some small quantities of conjecture, that point to a link between this D.N.A and our destinies." Claimed Prof Strand.
Read full storySource Reveals Girl Scout Cookies Actually Made From Girl Scouts
Richmond, VA ABC Bakers, a subsidiary of Richmond, VA based Interbake Foods, Inc., is coming under fire today, after an inside source revealed...
Read full storyWoman Marries Horse Illegally
Portland, ME - A lonely woman ended her singledom today. "Today, I married my best friend and , my horse, Spirited Lover. Boy does he live...
Read full storyPresident Bush Learns To Play Sax: Seeks Reelection in 2004
Washington, DC Unconfirmed reports are circulating around the White House that President George "Dubya" Bush is learning to play the...
Read full storySaturn Actually Made of Booze
Cape Canaveral, FL., U.S.A. - Scientists from N.A.S.A. made an unexpected discovery today when a unmanned space probe retrieved evidence that the planet Saturn may actually be an alcoholic's paradise.
Read full storyBucking the Trend, Burger King Introduces "Fat-Ass" Sizing
After this week's stunning announcement by McDonald's that it would be eliminating the "Super-Size" option from it's menus, analysts wondered if other major fast food chains would follow their lead as they have done in the past.
Read full storyBush: Fascism is good for Democracy
In a shock statement from the Whitehouse today, President Bush has called for an end to the universal right to vote.
Read full storySEPARATE but EQUAL
Albany, Georgia - The Bush administration passes law to prohibit coeducation. Recent studies have shown that some socially disabled students perform better in a single sex environment. Existing funds could provide for the most modern equipment in all...
Read full storyDiana tape secrets reveal nothing actually
Tapes on which Diana, Princess of Wales, tells secrets which everyone knew about eight years ago anyway, have sensationally been aired on US television.
Read full storyPope declares Kerry ‘Second Coming'
Vatican, Friday - In a shock announcement made at an impromptu Press Conference this morning the Supreme Pontiff has declared that John Kerry is "Christ reincarnated".
Read full storyBush Ad Nauseum
Three new Bush Campaign ads that feature the smoldering ruins of the World Trade Center have ignited criticism from the families of the victims, Democrats and anyone with a working moral compass. Unnamed Administration Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhous...
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