It looks like Wes Brown has 'shot his bolt' at Manchester United after a big row with none other than Alex Fergusson. The row took place during their summer tour of the USA and ended in a verbal row. Brown told us 'Roons (Rooney) had organised a t...
Manchester United boss, Sir Alex of the Ferguson confirmed this morning that he has indeed signed up the streaker who invaded the pitch last night in United's 5-2 Carling Cup victory over Scunthorpe. (Or 'Scunny as the locals call it.) The streake...
The Mighty Reds team bus: Sir Alex Ferguson was cheerily chewing away at his chewing gum after, yet again, 'cocking another snoop' at the BBC. Many years ago, the BBC dared to investigate through it's 'flagship' Panarama programme, a documentary...
Sky Sports bosses emerged ashen-faced and visibly shaken from a meeting with Manchester United supremo Sir Alex Ferguson yesterday. But their meeting may have exploded the great myth of the "hair-dryer" treatment. The meeting, at Manchester Utd...
George Osborne, Chancellor of the Exchequer, is preparing his emergency budget for next Wednesday. Following Britain's disastrous showing at the Eurovision song contest a double blow of England exiting from the World Cup in the first round and Mur...
Rafa Benitez is being lined up as the shock choice to replace Sir Alex Ferguson as manager of Manchester United. When Ferguson eventually retires Old Trafford chiefs plan to appoint Benitez. The announcement shocked many at first. Lifelong Manches...
Sir Alex Ferguson has rubbished all reports that he will retire next year and has vowed only to leave Old Trafford in a "Black Box" and even then he will come back and haunt the place. Hopeful inheritors to his throne, Jose "The Chosen One" Mourin...
An elderly gentleman was led from a Manchester bar late last night, shouting "I'm going nowhere, you hear me? Nowhere!" Passers by watched as the inebriated senior citizen was led to a waiting taxi. He frequently tried to escape his helpers and k...
Sir Alex Ferguson has finally announced the name of the man he wants to replace him at Manchester United. Typically, Fergie has gone for a fellow Scot. Gordon Brown may seem like a surprise choice to many, but Sir Alex is certain that such an appoint...
Alex Ferguson is considering leaving as Manager, of Manchester United, to enter the World Chewing Gum Championships. For the last two years Mr I Chew, Chairman of the World Chewing Gum Championships, has been sending emails to Ferguson, on a daily...
All top football referees in the UK are to be issued with special Fergie watches designed by Sir Alex Ferguson himself. The watches are expected to be used to keep time in all matches involving Manchester United. The watch has many special feature...
Alex Ferguson, Manager of Manchester United, and World record holder for chewing a piece of chewing gum, is to appear in the new Gum Advertisement instead of the guy in it just now Barry Diamond. Anybody who has ever watched a Manchester United m...
Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson sensationally announced last night that he was quitting chewing gum during matches. The legendary football boss said "Recently things have been getting me down. I decided to reassess my life. I don't re...
Sir Alex Ferguson, talking to reporters, began predicting the weather during his last interview. It appears he has always wanted to be a t.v. weatherman. Sir Alex told reporters, "We won't have Wayne for Sunday. It's nothing serious as we said"...
Sir Alex, ahead of tonights Preussian vs Mancurian titanic clash, has latched on to an ancient Bavarian tradition and promised the Bayern Munich fans the following: "We will pull the the Lederhosen's of the Bayern Players down and smack their bott...
The "Special One" returns to Chelsea this evening and has already told everybody he has nothing to prove, in fact, Chelsea must prove too him how great he really was or get stuffed by Inter Milan and they will prove how great Jose still is. Jose i...
"Golden Balls" David Beckham returned to Old Trafford and the whole blaze of publicity was turned into a rather "damp squid" after Rooney and Co spoilt his party In fact Sir Alex was so overjoyed at stuffing Beckhams present team of OAP,s, AC Mila...
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