Omaha - One hour before attending a party, Sarah Gibson, 34, asked her husband Mark, 33, a scientist of Astronomy, if he thought the pants she was wearing made her look fat. "Now be honest," she said. "I really need to know if these pants make me loo...
In the same tradition of Alistair Cooke's, Master-baiters Theater comes a new tradition, "Wives of the Satirists" to air this Sunday night on the BBC (Blue Balls for Cornelius). Wives featured on the new series, "Wives of the Satirists" will be the neglected wife of Duff, Mark Foley a.k.a. Lola boyfriend of the President, Queen Udder and Connie Booth.
This week, I spoke with an old friend for the first time in about twenty years. As we talked about the past, different events from our childhoods were brought back to light (ones that were better left in the dark). My wife, who heard much of the conversation, now thinks I'm terrible. My thirteen year old son, who also heard, now thinks me a hero.
(QnewZ) - Quick .. on the left? James Arness, Gunsmoke's Matt Dillon still alive and kicking at 83. On the right? Marshal Dillon's wife of 780 years, who knows, time gets lost in a bottle when you're dealing with that many candles on a birthday cake. Scary stuff all this especially with Halloween coming up. Looks like 6 foot 7 Marshal Dillon's about to hea...
Ned Niceguy, 38, was hospitalized yesterday with a broken leg and fractured jaw, wounds sustained when he was attacked by his wife Nora, 32, after he had presented her with a PMS Chocolate Wonder Bar bought at a specialty store. Apparently Nora had...
You know, I’ve never really given much thought to the future because I’ve always just planned on marrying a movie star and leeching off her my entire life. It’s always seemed like a good deal to me--she gets her power, independence, fame, etc, and I get to sleep in and watch the Spice Channel. Most men view women’s equality as threatening, but I disagree because I’ve never looked forward to...
Former U.S. President William Jefferson "Bill" Clinton had an unexpected sexual encounter in New York's Central Park yesterday while walking with his wife Hillary Rodham Clinton. The President had just dismissed reporters when a large,...
Posh Spice, the stick-thin shopping machine better known as David Beckham's wife, has launched her latest autobiography - ‘Learning to Sing'. The book, which the footballer's spouse allegedly wrote all on her own, charts her failed attemp...
The outrage over my article in last week's ‘Daily Shame' describing Arabs as "gay wife beaters", "nursery bombers" and "pension-stealin', benefit-defraudin', child-killin' towel heads" caused "offence" with some jumped-up rogues in the Government. I...
Commander in Chief and War President George Bush stood up to his critics in the post-Katrina firestorm by putting his mother and wife on the streets this week. Calling comments by rapper Kanye West and Democratic chairman Howard Dean "disgusting", th...
I once went out to dinner and a movie with a very attractive and fun woman. It was a first date for the two of us and my first date in over a year. Several church and message board friends who knew of my date had asked me to e-mail them the results and tell them how everything went. What they really wanted to know, in teenage boy terms, was "what base did you get to?" With my p...
CHICAGO (AP) The spouse killing business is showing a profitable increase in the 2nd quarter. One anonymous hired wife killer told our reporter, "There are a lot of husbands out there that want to get rid of their wives. Usually it's all about sex, b...
An expert prosecution witness confirmed that they had used GPS to track Scott Peterson after the disappearence of his wife Laci. They had however experienced a number of glitches, like the time it showed a reading that Scott was travelling at 30 000...
Television psychologist Dr. Philip McGraw's wife, Robin, tells reporters that the doc is a "big old goofy man" and she is much too attractive for him.
Snoop Doggy Dizzle is divorcing his wife's ass n' shit. Snoop's white ass lawyer issued a press relizzle which stated, "The beyotch be buggin', yo. She all up in Snoop's ass over the Girls Gone Wizzle n' shit. She constantly be naggin' his ass ‘bo...
Once just another soldier whose heroic exploits went unheard of and unknown, Master Chief was rocketed to stardom level with the release of a videogame titled 'Halo', loosely based off of his exploits in the military. Long-since retired, he now spends most of his time with his wife and twin children at their home in Billings, Montana. Recently, I had a chance to catch up to Master Chief an...
In 1993 my wife and I moved to the Catskill Mountains. We soon realized that there in the hills antenna based TV reception was impossible. We had just spent all our money on the down payment for our property, so we were too cash strapped to buy one of those huge satellite dishes that were so popular back then. We were also too far in the then wilderness to have any cable lines on our road ( actual...
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